Two Russian hunters meet.

    "I shot a gigantic bear yesterday," says Ivan. "Look at the hide!"

    "How do you find such huge bears?" Sergei asks.

    "Easy," says Ivan. "You stand in front of a cave and whistle. When the bear comes out, you shoot."

    Weeks later the two meet again. Sergei is covered in bandages.

    "Didn't you follow my advice?" Ivan asks.

    "Sure, I did. I stood, in front of a cave and whistled," Sergei replies.

    "And what came out?

    "To me," says Sergei, "it looked like the Trans-Siberian Express.

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