Got Any Peanuts?

A duck walked into a general store, waddled up to the counter and asked: "Got any peanuts?"

"No," said the assistant.

The following day the duck was back again, "Got any peanuts?"

"No," said the assistant firmly.

The next day duck came in again, "Got any peanuts?"

"No," yelled the assistant. "I've told you we don't have any peanuts. If you come back in here again and ask for peanuts, I'll nail your webbed feet to the floor."

The next day the duck came in again, "Got any nails?"

"No," said the assistant.

"Good. Got any peanuts?"

Previous Joke
Next Joke
More Universal Jokes

A Hollywood director was shooting a big budget movie on location in the desert. One day an old Indian came up to him and said, "Tomorrow rain...

Otto von Bismark, the first Chancellor of the German Empire from 1871-90 had been conversing for a rather long time with the British Ambassador...

Two guys went duck hunting. One drank a bottle and a half of whisky while the other kept watch. After two hours, a solitary duck flew up. The sober man took aim...

Santa goes to the podiatrist with a swollen foot. After a careful examination, the doctor hands him a pill that looks big enough to choke a...


We have no permanent friend. We have no permanent enemies. We just have permanent interests.


Beyonce Knowles' debut album "Dangerously in Love" earned her five Grammys.


Women take to good hearted men. Also from.