A man died and went up to heaven where he was greeted by St. Peter.

    "And who are you?" asked St. Peter.

    "My name is Steven Richards."

    "And what did you do for a living?" asked St. Peter.

    "I was unemployed."

    "Unemployed, hmmm?" mused St. Peter. "And have you ever done anything good in your life?"

    "As a matter of fact I have. I was walking along the street once and I saw a group of bikers who were threatening to beat up a defenceless girl. So I rushed to her rescue, pulled the ringleader off his hair, kicked him hard where it hurts and told him and his gang to clear off."

    "That's highly commendable," said St. Peter flicking through the man's file, "but I can't see any report of this incident. When did it happen?"

    "About five minutes ago."
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