A man went to a hospital in Toronto to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis.

    According to the nurse attending the operation, the patient's girlfriend found the ring in his pants pocket. She didn't know he was married and she was so mad she used petroleum jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.
    I don't know which is worse:
    1) Having your girlfriend find out you're married.

    2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.


    3) Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.

    Tough call.
  • Second Coming A Catholic girl went into confession and said to the priest, "I`m pregnant."
    He asked, "How did this happen, my child?"
    She said, "I think it must be the second coming...
  • Chinese Hotel Brochure Brilliant Beijing Hotel Brochure - Translated as only they can.
    A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels...
  • Going to Heaven An Young lady dies and goes to heaven. She`s chatting it up with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates when all of a sudden she hears the most awful, blood curdling screams. "Don`t worry about that...
  • We All Have One How long is your one?
    I have one.
    You have one.
    Your mother uses your father`s one and your auntie uses your uncle`s one.
    A married lady would...
  • Infidelity Suspecting her husband of infidelity, the woman attempted to put an end to it by arousing his jealousy.
    "What would you say if I told you that I`ve been sleeping with...