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    The following are all quotes collected from the science exams of elementary school students:

    Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.

    Some oxygen molecules help fires burn while others help make water, so sometimes it's brother against brother.

    Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state.

    When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire.

    Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.

    The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.

    The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

    Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they're there.

    Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.

    Water freezes at 32 degrees and boils at 212 degrees. There are 180 degrees between freezing and boiling because there are 180 degrees between north and south.

    A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.

    Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil.

    We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.

    To most people solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists solutions are things that are still all mixed up.

    I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.
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