A man is sitting reading his newspaper when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the head with a frying pan.

    "What was that for?" he asks.

    "That was for the piece of paper in your trouser pocket with the name 'Mary Ellen' written on it," she replies.

    "Don't be silly," he says, "Two weeks ago when I went to the races. Mary Ellen was the name of one of the horses I bet on."

    His wife seemed satisfied at this and apologized.

    Three days later he's again sitting in his chair reading when she nails him with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him out cold.

    When he comes around he asks, "What was that for?"

    "Your frickin' HORSE phoned!"
  • Sahara Forest! A lumber camp advertises for a lumberjack. A skinny Canadian guy shows up at the camp the next day carrying an axe. The head lumberjack takes one look at the puny little guy and tells him to get lost. "Give me a chance...
  • Alia Bhatt Hails Rio Heroes After the closing ceremony of Rio 2016, Alia Bhatt called up Navjot Singh Siddhu and said: Ek Cricketer Hokar Bhi Aapne Badminton Mein Silver Medal Jeet Liya. Hats off to you SIDDHU Sir... Tussi Great Ho!
  • Smarter than Einstien At the conclusion of the sermon, the worshipers filed out of the sanctuary to greet the minister. As one of them left, he shook the minister`s hand, thanked him for the sermon and said, "Thanks for the message...
  • What's Starvation? Little Johnny`s teacher was teaching the kids about starvation. Being a good teacher she decided to call on selected students to draw a picture of starvation on the board. Sue went first, she drew a round circle...
  • Not a Quitter! A guy walks into the human resources department of a large company and hands the executive his application. The executive begins to scan the sheet, and notices that the applicant has been fired from...