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    An old lady had always wanted to travel abroad. Now that she was getting on in years, she thought she would really like to do so before she died.

    Until then, she'd never even been out of the country. So she began by going in person to the Passport Office and asking how long it would take to have one issued.

    "You must take the loyalty oath first," responded the passport clerk. "Raise your right hand, please."

    The old gal raised her right hand.

    "Do you swear to defend the Constitution of the United States against all its enemies, domestic or foreign?" was the first question.

    The little old lady's face paled and her voice trembled as she asked in a small voice, "Uhhh..... all by myself?"
  • Milk Bath A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant...
  • Getting a Haircut Woman1: Oh! You got a haircut! That`s so cute!
    Woman2: Do you think so? I wasn`t sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don`t think it`s too fluffy looking?
    Woman1: Oh God no! No, it`s...
  • Irish Eye Test Seamus is having a bit of trouble seeing things at a distance so he goes into an opticians for an eye test. The optician asks him to cover his right eye with his left hand and read the letters on the card...
  • A Free Haircut A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. he placed the boy in the chair....
  • The Happiest Day Harry was finally a groom and was very excited about his upcoming marriage. He was on his way out of the office when his boss came over to him with an outstretched hand, "Congratulations Harry...
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