Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?"

    "I think so," the man replied. "We have a caterer coming to provide plenty of sandwiches and cakes for all of our guests."

    "I don't mean that," the priest responded. "I mean, are you prepared spiritually?"

    "Oh, sure," came the reply. "I've got a keg of beer and a case of whiskey."
  • Faulty Refrigerator Advice A man calls a refrigerator repair service. "My refrigerator isn`t working."
    "What kind is it?"
    "It`s a small one....
  • Paying The Check A fine-looking gentleman sat down in the main dining room of an expensive restaurant. He ordered a big dinner and spent an hour enjoying himself. After he was given the check, he summoned the headwaiter...
  • Motherly Pride Two mothers were talking about their sons.
    The first said, "My son is such a saint. He works hard, doesn`t smoke, and he hasn`t so much as looked at a woman in over two years...
  • Workplace Discrimination Boss, to four of his employees, "I`m really sorry, but I`m going to have to let one of you go."
    Black Employee, "I`m a protected minority.... Female Employee, "And I`m a woman."

    Oldest Employee, "Fire me, buster, and I`ll hit you with an age discrimination suit so fast it`ll make your head spin."

    To which they all turn to look at the helpless young, white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds, "I think I might be gay..."
  • Go Shooting! A young man from the city went to visit his farmer uncle. For the first few days, the uncle showed him the usual things - chickens, cows, crops, etc. After three days, however, it was obvious that the nephew was...