•  

    The Bureau of Meteorology forecasts rainstorms so the bride can expect a few good inches overnight.

    Love is a thousand miles long but comes in six inch instalments.

    The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

    Confucious say man who sink into womans arms soon have arms in womans sink.

    Sorry I cannot be at Wedding... Please send me a photo of Bride and Groom Mounted.

    Easy on the throttle, steady on the gears, roll her over gently and She'll last for many years.

    Dont keep him in the dog house too often or he might give his bone to the woman next door.

    Treat him like a flower... grab him by the stalk.

    If you don't want the Stork to come, Shoot in the air.

    Go for it mate. We all did!

    All the best from Mr and Mrs Farkin and all the Farkin kids.

    She offered her honour, He honoured her offer, and all night he was on her and off her.

    Don't Spring on the Inner-Spring this Spring or there will be an Off-Spring next Spring.

    Hope your honeymoon is like a train ride through the Khyber Pass, One long hard route.

    Please remember that Brandy makes you Randy, Whisky makes you Frisky, but its a good stiff Johnny Walker that makes you Pregnant.

    Travel Agency to Bride: The grooms face leaves at midnight. Be on it.

    Football coach to bride: If you've tried him in 18 positions and he's still no good, pull him off.

    Treat the Bride like a new car, go easy for the first 500.
  • Sexual Orientation! One day a father and his ten-year-old son were on the bus, when the boy noticed a redhead with huge breasts..."Hey Pop," the son cried, "look at those boobs!"
    The father, a religious man proceeded to send the boy to...
  • Sex With Animals A priest was arriving at his new parish in a small rural community. One of the members met him at the train with his horse and buggy to drive him to his new church. As they were going along the way, they passed a man...
  • Watching The Obscene Act It was a difficult case for the jurors. They had to decide whether the owners of the Bottoms Up Club in NYC were guilty of obscenity. The Judge decided that it would probably be best if the jury went to the club and see...
  • Let's Play... Jill had been sick for quite a while with a sore throat and a cough. Her doctor had told her that she could infect John, so there was to be NO intimate contact between them until she was well. That was why they had...
  • House Painting One day, a painter found himself short of help and went to the unemployment office to hire someone for the day. When he arrived, they didn`t have any painters available, but they did have a Gynaecologist there...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT