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    A roving reporter from the BBC was touring a remote part of the Scottish Highlands looking for material for a documentary about the way of life there.

    REPORTER: Hello there, excuse me, I'm from the BBC and I'm gathering material for a documentary about the way of life in the remote parts of the Scottish Highlands. You look like an interesting fellow, perhaps I could interview you?

    SCOTSMAN: Certainly...

    REPORTER: Well, perhaps you could start by telling me your name?

    SCOTSMAN: Well now there's a story. Y'know I deliver the mail round here, but do they call me Donald the Postman? No they don't. You see those fine crofts up on the hill there, well, I built more than half of them myself, but do they call me Donald the Croftbuilder? No, they don't. And did you pass the nets down in the harbour? Well, I made several of them, but do they call me Donald the Netmaker? No, they don't. But, I tell you, a moment's weakness with just ONE sheep....
  • The Gay Baby Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm and have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. Two dozen babies are in the ward...
  • So...You Want to Marry My Daughter? An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a hillbilly all want to marry the farmer`s daughter. The farmer says, "Well, y`all got to prove how bad you want her. You gotta run across that there field...
  • Is Masturbation Harmful? A concerned patient asked the doctor if masturbation is harmful.
    "Not usually," answered the doctor. "Not unless you do it too often."
    "How about three times a day?" the patient asked...
  • Damn that Sonofabitch There was this woman sitting on a park bench muttering to herself and spitting. She would mutter, then spit, mutter, then spit, she would say, "Damn, that sonofabitch can drive", then spit...
  • Balls Like Bull Two old ladies lived way out in the country, only going into town on Sundays for church. One Sunday, there was a strange pastor, a very handsome man, in the pulpit, preaching away quite merrily...
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