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    Stacey makes a new friend at school and invites her home for the first time. Stacey excuses herself to fetch her mother and introduce her new friend. As her friend is standing in the living room next to the fireplace, she picks up the attractive vase on the mantle.

    When Stacey returns with her mother, her friend is staring curiously into the vase. "Oh, those are my father's ashes," Stacey informs her New friend.

    However, this startles her so that she drops the vase with a gasp! ashes and broken vase scattering all around. After turning three shades of red she stammers out, "Oh, no... I'm, oh!... I, can't... Didn't Mean to..."

    "It's OK dear," the mother says. "The vase was just from Asda."

    The new friend catches her breath enough to say, "But ... But your Husband's' ashes..."

    "Well," the mother says, "looks like he'll just have to get himself up and get the ashtray from the kitchen from now on!"
  • Prescription Drug A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." ¬ĚThe pharmacist asked, "Why in the world...
  • Your Dog Was Depressed Jason gets off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously knocks on his blind date`s door. She opens it and is very beautiful and charming. "I`ll be ready in a few minutes," she says. "Why don`t you play with Spot...
  • Christmas Party Warning A warning to all you drivers, be careful about drunk driving as we`re getting close to Christmas and Police are out there checking on people. Last night I was out for a few drinks. One thing lead to another...
  • Fake News On a very Serious note, please be informed that somebody is trying to cause false alarm and despondency by spreading a very bad rumor about me. Some people are intentionally trying to harm my reputed image...
  • A Slip of the Tongue One day there was a priest sitting in a pew with a very worried and nervous look, and a another priest saw him and wondered what was wrong. The second priest thought he should try to help, so he approached...