•  

    The nurse approached him, smiling. "The labor is going great," she said. "Wouldn't you like to come in?"

    "Oh, no," the man shook his head.

    The nurse returned to the mother's side, and the labor progressed smoothly.

    As the birth neared, the nurse returned to the man, now pacing frantically in the hall.

    "She's doing so well," she assured him. "Wouldn't you like to at least come in and see her?"

    The man seemed to hesitate slightly, then shook his head again, "No, no, I couldn't do that."

    He jingled car keys in his sweaty palm and resumed his pacing.

    The nurse went back into the room and coached Mom's valiant efforts in pushing the baby into the world.

    As the baby's head began to exit the birth canal, the nurse raced to the hall, grabbed the man by his elbow, and dragged him to the bedside saying, "You have got to see this!"

    At that very moment, the baby boy was born and placed on the tummy of the mother whose radiant smile shone through her tears.

    The man began to cry openly. Turning to the nurse, he sobbed, "You were right! This is the greatest moment in my life!"

    By now, the nurse, too, was tearful. She put her arm around him, and he rested his head on her shoulder. She soothed, "No one should miss the birth of their son."

    "This isn't my son," the man blubbered. "This isn't even my wife. I've never seen her before in my life. I was just bringing the car keys to my buddy across the hall!"
  • How Do I Become Born Again? Three Texans were in a bar throwing back a few, while they were discussing the meaning of life. The conversation grew deeper and deeper when one of the gents started talking about reincarnation. The trio started considering...
  • 100 Year Old Sex Maniac An old man turned 100 and was being interviewed by a reporter for the local paper. During the interview the reporter noticed that the yard was full of children of all ages playing together. A very pretty girl...
  • Young Bill was courting Mabel, from the adjoining cattle ranch. One evening, as they sat on Bill`s porch watching the sun go down over the western hills, Bill spied his prized stallion humping one of his mares...
  • Population Growth A small town with a high birth rate attracted the attention of a team of university sociologists. They wrote a grant proposal, got a chunk of money, hired aides and an anthropologist, found a family planning...
  • Compliment or Sexual Harassment? Every day a man would walk up to a woman in her office, stand very close to her, inhale a deep breath of air, and say, "Your hair sure smells nice!"
    After a week of this, she reports him to the Human Resources Department...