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    A friend asked a gentleman how it is that he never married.

    The gentleman replied, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman... I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl."

    "Oh, come on now," said the friend, "surely you have met at least one girl that you wanted to marry?"

    "Yes, there was one girl once. I guess she was the one perfect girl, the only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything. I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me."

    "Well, why didn't you marry her?" asked the friend. "She was looking for the perfect man," he said.
  • Cat Food A woman is enjoying a good game of bridge with her girlfriends one evening.
    "Oh, no! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He`s going to really ticked if it`s not ready on time...
  • Aggressive and Hostile A motorcycle police officer stops a driver for shooting through a red light. The driver is a real jerk, steps out of his car and comes striding toward the officer, demanding to know why he is being harassed...
  • Pour Me A Drink A man sits down on a bar stool and tells the bartender, "Pour me a drink before the trouble starts."
    The bartender looks puzzled, but pours him a drink. The man chugs it and says, "Pour me another drink...
  • Health is Wealth Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris` Last Will and Testament.
    "To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 150 acres of land...
  • Anything For You A Male mosquito to its wife: Darling I will hunt a Lion for you.
    Female mosquito: Ok fine, now go to sleep.
    Male mosquito: I will bite an elephant and bring his blood for you...