A nice story - will make you appreciate family...however for most of us, it's too late!

    My grandmother died in the 50s, but her birthday is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce. The long walks we used to take to the store in town, the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling weeds or washing the sidewalk.

    Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was only about 13. We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40 soda bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day.

    She told me that one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own family. "And always remember this thing," she said. "Be sure you marry a woman with small hands."
    "How come, Grandma?" I asked her.

    She answered in her soft Irish voice. "Makes your dick look bigger."

    Kinda brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?
  • This Board With Holes A man enters a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for a pack of condoms.
    The Pharmacist asks, "What size?"
    The man replies, "I do not know...
  • Clogged Toilet! A superintendent of a large, apartment building got the ultimate revenge when he was called for the umpteenth time to fix a rather snooty tenant`s clogged toilet. Going to her apartment, where the female...
  • Bill Clinton Wax Figure The wax museum just acquired a very good wax figure of ex prez Bill Clinton. They had it arranged to show him in an authoritative stance in front of several staff members set on a stage made up like the oval office...
  • One Excited Old Priest The priest leaned closer to hear the girl`s confession. "So me and my cousin were alone in the house," she continued, "and went up to my bedroom..."
    "Go on, my child," said the priest gently...
  • Sex With The Teacher After picking her son up from school one day, the mother asks him what he did at school. The kid replies, "I had sex with my teacher."
    She gets so mad that when they get home, she orders him to...