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    A panhandling bum is walking along in the theater district just around matinee time.

    The streets are crowded with people rushing to get in to their shows. The bum sees a well dressed man walking along and goes up to him and asks, "Sir, can I borrow a quarter?"

    The man stops and says in a very dignified tone, "Neither a borrower nor a lender be! - William Shakespeare."

    The bum looks back at the man and says, "Up yours, you cheap bastard - John Johnson."
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