Santa on duty
 A new soldier, Banta, was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear: No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield.
A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back.
Banta said, "Halt, who goes there?"
The sergeant, who was driving, motioned to the back seat and said, "Brigadier."
"I`m sorry, I can`t let you through. You have to have a sticker on the windshield."
The Brigadier yelled from the back, "Drive on!"
Banta replied, "Hold it! You really can`t come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker."
The Brigadier repeated, "I`m telling you, son, drive on!"
Banta walked up to the rear window and said, "Sir, I`m new at this. Do I shoot you or your driver?"
More Universal Jokes
A very large, old building was being torn down in Chicago to make room for a new skyscraper. Due to its proximity to other buildings it could not be imploded and had to be dismantled floor by floor.
While working on the 49th floor, two construction workers found a skeleton in a small closet behind the elevator shaft. They decided that... The little sexy housewife was built so well that the TV repairman couldn`t keep his eyes off of her. Every time she came in the room, he`d near about jerk his neck right out of joint looking at her.
When he`d finished she paid him and said, 'I`m going to make a . . .well . . . unusual request. But you have to... Santa and his son were visiting America for the very first time.
Santa was at a Local Food store going up & down the aisles with his son.
Santa asked, 'What is this??
Santa`s son, 'Powdered orange juice'
Santa, 'Powdered orange juice??'
Son: 'Yeah, Dad. You just... Walking up to a department store`s fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, 'I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?'
'Only one kiss per meter madam,' replied Banta (clerk).
'That`s fine,' replied the girl. 'I`ll take...
|
