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    A motorcycle cop on patrol watched as Banta in a car slowed down at a stop sign, without coming to a complete stop, then sped off.
    The motorcycle cop pulled the vehicle over and approached Banta.
    "Sir, can I please see your license and rgistration."
    Banta replies, "Not until you tell me what the heck I did wrong, Officer."
    The officer explain, "You didn`t come to a complete stop at the stop sign a few blocks back."
    "Let me guess," said Banta, "all the wine shops are closed today!"
    "Sir, I`m going to overlook that last comment. Now, if you would please show me your license and registration."
    Banta counters, "Not until you tell me the difference between slowing down and coming to a complete stop."
    "Sir, step out of the car."
    As Banta reluctantly gets out of his car, the officer begins beating him over the head with his nightstick and exclaims, "Now, sir, would you like me to slow down or come to a complete stop!"
  • Imitating A new missionary recruit went to Venezuela for the first time. He was struggling with the language and didn`t understand a whole lot of what was going on. Intending to visit one of the local churches, he got lost, but eventually got back on track and found the place. Having arrived late, the church was already packed. The only pew left was the one on the front row.
    So as not to make a fool of himself, he decided to...
  • Chocolate almonds A priest decides one mid weekday to visit one of his elderly parishoners, Mrs. Smith. He rings the door bell and Mrs. Smith appears.
    'Good Day Mrs. Smith. I just thought I would drop by and see how your are doing.'
    The woman says, 'Oh just fine Father, come on in and we`ll have some tea.'
    While sitting a the coffee table, the priest notices...
  • Fencing!! Three guys were trying to sneak into the Asian Games Village at Busan,South Korea to scoop souvenirs and autographs.
    The first says, 'Let`s watch the registration table to see if there`s a crack in the security system that we can utilize to scam our way in.'Immediately, a burly athlete walks up to the table and states...
  • No risks Santa went on a vacation to the Middle East with most of his family including his mother-in-law. During their vacation and while they were visiting Jerusalem, Santa`s mother-in-law died.
    With the death certificate in hand, Santa went to the Indian Consulate Office to make arrangements to send the body back to Punjab, India for a proper funeral ceremony.
    The Consul, after hearing of the death of the mother-in-law told Santa...
  • Correct but useless There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives on board. He was coming into the Seattle airport through thick fog with less than 10 miles visibility when his instruments went out.
    He began circling around looking for a landmark. Finally, a small opening in the fog appears and he...