The final examination for an English class was two hours long and exam booklets were provided. The teacher was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail. A half hour into the exam, Little Johnny came rushing in and asked the teacher for an exam booklet.
    "You`re not going to have time to finish this," the teacher stated sarcastically as he handed him a booklet.
    "Yes I will," replied Little Johnny.
    He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the teacher called for the exams, and all the students filed up and handed them in except Johnny, who continued writing. Fifteen minutes later, Little Johnny came up to the teacher who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.
    "No you don`t, I`m not going to accept that. It`s late."
    Little Johnny looked incredulous and angry. "Do you know WHO I am?"
    "No, as a matter of fact I don`t," replied the teacher.
    "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" Little Johnny said again.
    "No, and I don`t care." replied the teacher with an air of superiority.
    "Good," replied Little Johnny, who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and walked out of the room.
  • Slow down A motorcycle cop on patrol watched as Banta in a car slowed down at a stop sign, without coming to a complete stop, then sped off.
    The motorcycle cop pulled the vehicle over and approached Banta.
    'Sir, can I please see your license and rgistration.'
    Banta replies, 'Not until you tell me what...
  • Speeding Banta Banta is pulled over by the same motorcycle cop who caught him earlier last month for not stopping at lights and beat him up. So Banta decides to go for a revenge this time.
    Banta: Is there a problem Officer?
    Cop: Sir, you were speeding.
    Banta: Oh I see.
    Cop: Can I see your licence please?
    Banta: I`d give it to you but...
  • Imitating A new missionary recruit went to Venezuela for the first time. He was struggling with the language and didn`t understand a whole lot of what was going on. Intending to visit one of the local churches, he got lost, but eventually got back on track and found the place. Having arrived late, the church was already packed. The only pew left was the one on the front row.
    So as not to make a fool of himself, he decided to...
  • Chocolate almonds A priest decides one mid weekday to visit one of his elderly parishoners, Mrs. Smith. He rings the door bell and Mrs. Smith appears.
    'Good Day Mrs. Smith. I just thought I would drop by and see how your are doing.'
    The woman says, 'Oh just fine Father, come on in and we`ll have some tea.'
    While sitting a the coffee table, the priest notices...
  • Fencing!! Three guys were trying to sneak into the Asian Games Village at Busan,South Korea to scoop souvenirs and autographs.
    The first says, 'Let`s watch the registration table to see if there`s a crack in the security system that we can utilize to scam our way in.'Immediately, a burly athlete walks up to the table and states...