One day Gramma sent her grandson little Johnnie down to the water hole to get some water to cook dinner.
    As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Gramma's kitchen.
    "Well now, where's my bucket and where's my water?" Gramma asked him.
    "I can't get any water from that water hole, Gramma" exclaimed Johnnie. "There's a BIG ol' alligator down there!"
    "Now don't you mind that ol' alligator, Johnnie. He's been there for a few years now, and he's never hurt no one. Why, he's probably as scared of you as you are of him!"
    "Well, Gramma," replied Johnnie, "if he's as scared as I am, then that water ain't fit to drink!"
  • How generous! A lawyer was reading out the will of a rich man to the people mentioned in the will:
    'To you, my loving wife Rachelwho stood by me in rough times, as well as good...
  • Rooster replacement Banta was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car and up floated a cloud of feathers.
    Shaken, Banta pulled over...
  • Cross-examine A small, uncertain, and nervous witness was being cross-examined.
    The lawyer thundered, 'Have you ever been married?'
    'Yes, sir,' said the witness in a low voice. 'Once.'
    'Whom did you...
  • Wrong answer Santa is sitting at the coffee shop, staring morosely into his coffee.
    Banta walks in and sits down. After trying to start a conversation several times and getting only distracted grunts, he asks...
  • Golfer After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home.
    As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked...