• The Mind Reader
    The weather was very hot and this man wanted desperately to take a dive in a nearby lake. He didn't bring his swimming outfit, but who cared? He was all alone. So he undressed and got into the water.

    After some delightful minutes of cool swimming, a pair of old ladies walked onto the shore in his direction. He panicked, got out of the water and grabbed a bucket lying in the sand nearby. He held the bucket in front of his private area and sighed with relief.

    The ladies got nearby and looked at him. He felt awkward and wanted to move.

    Then one of the ladies said, "You know, I have a special gift, I can read minds."

    "Impossible', said the embarrassed man, 'You really know what I think?"

    "Yes", the lady replied, "Right now, I bet you think that the bucket you're holding has a bottom."
  • Fastest Turtle Fastest Turtle A guy comes walking into a bar with a little turtle in his hand. The turtle's one eye is black and blue, two of his legs are bandaged, and his whole shell is taped together with...
  • Big Nuts Big Nuts A teacher puts a photograph of a tomcat on the blackboard, and proceeds to ask the class, if they can tell her how the tail is attached to the cat. Little Mary has the first attempt and answers...
  • Women Powers Women Powers At an international women's conference the topic for discussion was how to empower women in the home. The first speaker was the British representative. She stood up and said...
  • Son of a Bitch Son of a Bitch A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus six, that son of a bitch is eight. Three plus four, that son of a bitch is seven...."

  • Rear Drops ! Rear Drops ! A blonde brought her baby to a doctor. The doctor right away determined that the baby had an earache. He wrote a prescription for eardrops. In the directions...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT