• Insemination Man

    A blond City girl named Amy marries a N. Dakota rancher.

    One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, "The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today, so I drove a nail into the 2 by 4 just above where the cow's stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?"

    The rancher leaves for the fields. After awhile, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door.

    Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows and when Amy sees the nail, she tells him, "This is the one right here."

    The man, assuming he is dealing with an air head blond, asks, "Tell me lady, 'cause I'm dying to know; how would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?"

    "That's simple," she said. "By the nail that's over its stall," she explains very confidently.

    Laughing rudely at her, the man says, "And what, pray tell, is the nail for?"

    The blond turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, "I guess it's to hang your pants on."
  • Preparing to Start a Family

    The young blonde bride made her first appointment with a gynecologist and told him that she and her husband wished to start a family.

    "We've been trying for months now, doctor, and I don't seem to be able to get pregnant," she confessed miserably.

    "I'm sure we'll solve your problem," the doctor reassured her.

    "If you'll just take off your clothes and get up on the examining table."

    "Well, all right, doctor," agreed the young woman, blushing, "but I'd rather have my husband's baby."
  • Words of Encouragement!!!

    A 75 year old tycoon and his 22 year old blonde bride were on their way from the wedding reception to the honeymoon suite at the Plaza. Suddenly he had a tremendous heart attack. The paramedics were called to the scene and worked to stabilize the old man.

    The paramedics labored furiously over his frail body as the ambulance rushed across town.

    The tycoon's pulse remained feeble and erratic, so, one of the medics turned to the blonde bride and said, "How about giving your husband a few words of encouragement? I think he could use them."

    "Okay," she agreed with a shrug.

    She leaned toward the stretcher and whispered, "Honey, I hope you perk up real fast. I'm so horny I'm ready to hop on one of these cute guys in white."
  • Blonde Discovers a New Sports Injury

    A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde.

    The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.

    Finally, after many side glances from her, he said, "Its golf balls."

    Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him for a very long time, thinking deeply about what he had said.

    After several minutes, unable to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"