• How Condoms are Made

    My dentist shared a good one with me on Thursday. He recounts how he was sharing this story with an elderly lady, just as he was putting on his rubber gloves.

    "Do you know how they make these rubber gloves?"

    She said, "No?"

    "Well", he spoofed, "down in Puerto Rico they have this big building set up with a large tank of latex, and the natives walk up to the tank, and dip their hands in - and then walk around for a bit while the latex sets up - then they peel off the gloves and throw them into the big 'Finished Goods Crate' and go around again."

    And she didn't laugh a bit!!!

    Five minutes later, during the procedure, he had to stop cleaning her teeth because she burst out laughing.

    She explained, "I just suddenly thought about how they must be making condoms...!"
  • Self-medication is Dangerous

    A doctor drives by a small town. He stops at a gas station and notices there is no one there. A little kid passes by and tells him the gas station is closed because everyone is a the funeral of the owner's daughter.

    Since he was out of gas, he decided to stay for the night and goes to the funeral. When he gets there he goes in and looks at the open casket and notices that something is wrong.

    He calls the father, "Sir, I am a doctor and I can assure you she is not dead, she is in a catatonic sleep."

    "What do we do now?" asks the father.

    "Does she have a boyfriend?" asks the doctor.

    "Yes," replies the father.

    "Take her to a room and have the boyfriend have sex with her."

    They do as the doctor said and sure enough, she wakes up. Everybody was happy and the doctors leaves once he fill up his gas tank.

    A few months go by and the doctor returns to the same gas station. The same kid greets him again, "Doctor, It's so great to see you again. About a week ago Mr. Edward died. Half of the town has screwed him already but he is just not waking up."

    Moral of the story: See a doctor before self medicating.
  • Black Testicles!!!

    A man is lying in bed in the hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. a young nurse appears to sponge his hands and feet.

    "Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

    Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your hands and feet."

    He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, are my testicles black?"

    Finally, she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand and takes a close look, and says, "There's nothing wrong with them!"

    Finally, the man pulls off his oxygen mask and replies, "That was very nice but, are... my... test... results... back???"
  • I Feel Guilty

    Sherryl, a pert and pretty nurse took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked.

    "Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It's got so that every time I date one of the young doctors here, I end up shagging him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week."

    "I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your will power and resolve in this matter."

    "NO!!!" exclaimed the nurse. "I want you to fix it so I won't feel guilty and depressed afterward!"