|A new bride went to her doctor for a check up. Lacking knowledge of the male anatomy, she asked the doctor, "What's that thing hanging between my husbands legs?" |
The doctor replies, "We call that the penis."
The new bride then asks, "What's that reddish/purple thing on the end of the penis?"
The doctor replies, "We call that the head of the penis."
The bride then asks, "What are those 2 round things about 15 inches from the head of the penis?"
The doctor replies, "Lady, on him I don't know, but on me they're the cheeks of my ass!"
|Two very nervous men got to talking in the doctor's waiting room.|
They discovered they had similar symptoms: one had a red ring around the base of his 'you know what' and the other one had a green ring.
The fellow with the red ring was examined first. In a few minutes he came out, all smiles, and said, "Don't worry, man, it's nothing."
Vastly relived, the second man went into the examining room, only to be told a few minutes later by the doctor, "I'm sorry, but you have an advanced case of VD. I'm afraid you'll have to be castrated."
Turning white, the young man gasped, "But the first guy... he said it was no big deal!"
"Well, you know," said the doctor, "there's a big difference between gangrene and lipstick."
|The madam had assembled some of her girls for the men in town for the pharmacists' convention.|
"This is Dolores," she smiled, "for $250 I can promise you an exciting evening starting with a hot tub."
"And this is Connie, available for $375. She's rigged an Oriental Swing in her room.
"Now lovely Maria," she continued, "can be yours for both straight and kinky sex, including bondage. She's yours for the night for only $300."
"And if you take a fancy to tantalizing Jenny here, why she can..."
"Just a minute." interrupted one of the druggists. "Don't you have any generic ones?"
|A pregnant woman went to the gynecologist, and when asked that was the problem, she responded, "Well, whenever I take off my clothes, my nipples get hard."|
Shocked, the doctor took a deep breath, then asked, "Your nipples get hard?"
"Yes" quite innocently came her reply.
"Undress so I can check" replied the still amazed doc.
So, she undressed, and he got down to the feeling and massaging, trying to reach an answer.
After some considerable time, the doctor, still looked puzzled, said, "Well madame, I don't know what you have, but it sure as hell is contagious!"