|An 80 yr old man just got married with a young wife.|
Fearing with all the sex that he is having with his new bride, he seeks Doctor's advice on the best way to deal with it.
Oldman: Doc, I am 80 and am sexually active again. What's the best way to have safe sex without getting heart attack...??
Doctor: At your age , I highly recommend you to use 'The Dog Style'...
Oldman: Doc, are you serious?? My back is weak.. How can you advice me to do Doggie Style?
Doctor: I said Dog Style... not Doggie style. Dog style - just sniff the pussy...
|Rose had come to see Dr. Hardy. When the psychiatrist began using sexual terms, she interrupted, "Wait, what is a phallic symbol?"|
"A phallic symbol," explained Hardy, "represents the phallus."
"What's a phallus?" asked Rose.
"Well," said the analyst, "The best way to explain it is to show you."
He stood up, unzipped his fly and took out his pecker.
"This is a phallus."
"Oh, I get it," said Rose. "It's the word for a very small penis.
|A man was suffering from a stomach ache, so he told his wife who suggested he try the tablets the doctor had given her for a similar pain.|
After taking his wife's tablets for a week, the pain disappeared but he developed two rather tender lumps, one behind each ear.
He went to his doctor, showed him the lumps, and explained what had happened.
Whereby the Doctor called him all the fools under the sun, saying, "You bloody idiot! I was treating your wife for a fallen womb, God knows how I'm going to get your balls back down."
|Anyone who's ever been to a "teaching hospital" knows to expect a group of students to descend upon them at any time.|
At one such hospital, in the recovery room, a bunch of students gathered around a beautiful blonde who, even in a gown, was obviously very well endowed.
Recovery is an excellent place for student doctors to become familiar with variations in heartbeats while the body comes back to normal from the operation and the anesthesia.
The first student approached the patient calmly and proceeded to listen intently to her heartbeat through the stethoscope.
The group was silent as he did so.
The woman hesitated, then looked sympathetically into the eyes of the doctor-to-be. Reaching up, she gently placed the earpieces into his ears.