|There was 3 Irishmen in Dublin. One day while sight seeing they ran upon a whorehouse. Excited, they entered the whorehouse like kids entering a toy store. The first man had Pound 5.00, the second man had Pound 10.00, and the third man had Pound 15.00.|
The first man approached the lady behind the desk and said, "I got Pound 5.00! What do I get for Pound 5.00?"
The lady spoke over the intercom and said, "Ginger-- take this gentleman upstairs and give him Pound 5.00 worth!"
The first man came back downstairs grinning from ear to ear. The other two men said, "Man, what did you get for Pound 5.00?"
The first man explained that she took it out of his pants she put whipped cream all over it, then licked it all off.
This exited the 2nd man and he quickly approached the lady at the desk. He said, "Okay, I have Pound 10.00! What do I get for Pound 10.00?"
The lady spoke over the intercom and said, "Tasha, take this gentleman upstairs and give him Pound 10.00 worth!"
The 2nd man came downstairs, grinning from ear to ear, as if he was on Cloud Nine. The other two men met him and asked, "Man, what did you get for Pound 10.00?"
The 2nd man explained she took it out of his pants, put whipped cream on it, nuts and chocolate topping and she licked it all off.
This excited the 3rd man, so he nervously approached the lady at the desk and said, "I have Pound 15.00. What can I get for Pound 15.00?"
The lady turned on the intercom again and said, "Melissa, take this gentleman upstairs and give him Pound 15.00 worth!"
The 3rd man came downstairs with a huge frown on his face, and on the brink of tears.
Curious, the other 2 men asked, "Man, why are you so sad. What could've went wrong? You had Pound 15.00?"
The 3rd man said, "Boys, she took it out of my pants, put whipped cream all over it. Then she put strawberries, pineapple topping, chocolate syrup, nuts and a big cherry on top! It looked so good... I ate it myself."
|A Pakistani and his girlfriend had planned to go to Starbucks. It was for the first time that He was visiting Starbucks or in fact any modern Cafe for that matter.|
He practiced whole afternoon to be calm and ask for a 'Tall Latte' to impress her...
A little later in the evening at Starbucks...
Hello, I want two Lall Tatte...
|Responding to the new mandatory $15 minimum wage, a Seattle business owner called in his 4 employees for a meeting. Boys, I'm really sorry, but I'm going to have to let one of you go."|
Black Employee, "I'm a protected minority."
Female Employee, "And I'm a woman."
Oldest Employee, "Fire me, buster, and I'll hit you with an age discrimination suit so fast it'll make your head spin."
...To which they all turn to look at the helpless young, white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds, "I think I might be gay..."
|The poor little rich girl awoke after a long night out on the town with her friends. She found herself totally naked and with a monster of a hangover, so she rang for her butler and ordered a strong cup of black coffee.|
When he delivered it, she said, "Jeeves, I can't remember a thing about last night. How did I get to bed?"
"I carried you upstairs, Ma'am, and put you to bed."
"But my dress?"
"It seemed a pity to crumple it, so I removed it and hung it in your closet."
"But what about my underwear?"
"I feared the elastic might limit your circulation, so I took the liberty of removing them."
"What a night!" she sighed. "I must have been tight!"
"Only the first time, Ma'am!"