|Sales Guy was selling a TV to a middle aged man and his wife.|
Sales Guy: So it's between the 32 and the 34 inch TV, right?
Husband: Yes, but I don't understand the difference between them.
Sales Guy: Well, they have the same specifications all the way down the line. One is just bigger.
Husband: Who in the hell would pay almost Rs.10,000 more for two more inches?
Wife: I would!
|The loneliness of a middle-aged man and woman - both divorcees, eventually blossomed into love and finally marriage, but the wedding night turned into a real disaster.|
"You just do not fulfill me sexual expectations," the bride commented the following morning.
You're right about that." replied the new husband. "But when I promised to fill the void in your life, I simply had no idea that it would be so blooming large!"
|A Survey Conducted Among Women Gave The Below Results.|
"A" Were The Answers Given By Un-Married Women And "B" Are The Answers Given By Married Women.
Q: What Is The One Thing That Pierces A Woman Hard, When She Hugs A Man?
B. Unshaved Facial Hair.
Q: What Is The Most Painful Experience During Sex?
A. Beginning Of Intercourse.
B. When My Hair Gets Entangled.
Q: How Long Does An Intercourse Last?
A. Around One Hour.
B. Just About 6 Mins.
Q: One Thing That A Woman Hates About Sex?
A. Risk Of Pregnancy.
B. The Cleaning Up.
Q: What Do Men Hate Most In A Woman's Body?
A. Body Odour / Unwanted Hair / Flab.
Q: Which Is The One Part Of Woman's Body That Can Get Her Into Trouble?
Q: What Is The One Quality That A Man Likes In A Woman?
A. Simplicity/intelligence/ Understanding.
Q: When Is A Man In Maximum Mood For Sex?
A. At Night/when Naked.
B. Those 5 Days.
Q: Which Part Of A Woman's Body Is Most Liked By Men?
B. Closed Mouth.
Q: When Is A Man, Not In Mood To Have Sex?
A. When He Is Sick/ Tired / Upset.
B. When He Is Hungry.
Q: When Is A Man, Very Kind To His Wife?
A. When He Needs Help/ When Aroused.
B. In Front Of Other Women.
|A married man was talking about birthdays.|
He said to his friend, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday, she has everything already. And besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I'm at a loss."
His friend says, "I have an idea. Why don't you make up a certificate. It will say she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way she wants it. She will be thrilled."
So he did just that.
The next day his friend said, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?"
"Yes, I did," was the answer.
"Did she like it?" His buddy asked.
"Oh yes! She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out door." She was yelling, "I'll be back in an hour!"