• The Virtuous Woman

    Morris the matchmaker approached a single woman and told her he had a husband for her.

    "I'm ashamed to bring this up," he said, "but the man wants to be sure you are compatible in bed. He wants, he says, a sample."

    The woman was shocked, "Such a thing you ask an orthodox virtuous woman? Such a crude person would suggest such a thing? He must be a barnyard animal, not a gentleman."

    The matchmaker, trying to earn a fee, said, "He's a business man. He buys goods in the market and he sells goods.By him, it's not a big deal... just a sample."

    She thought a minute. "He's a business man? So tell him I don't give samples. If he wants, I can give him 50 or 60 references."
  • Little Johnny Charged With Rape

    Once again, Little Johnny was in trouble, but this time it was serious. He was charged with the rape of a grown woman, and although the crime appeared to be highly improbable, the state's evidence was overwhelming.

    As a last desperate move, the defense attorney went over to the witness stand, pulled Little Johnny's pants down and grabbed hold of the boy's tiny penis for all to see.

    Turning towards the jury box, the lawyer cried, "Ladies and gentlemen, surely you cannot believe that such a small, still undeveloped organ is sexually mature?"

    Growing more agitated, he continued, "How could this miniature member possibly be capable of even an erection, let alone the rape of a grown woman!"

    "Careful!" Little Johnny yelped, "One more shake and you're going to lose the case!"
  • LEONE or LION ?

    A Teacher asks students about sounds made by animals......

    Teacher: dog....

    Student: Bhow Bhow....

    Teacher: Cat...

    student: Meow Meow...

    Teacher: Lion...

    Papput: Aaah aaaaaaah..... yeehh yeeehh..... commme oonnnn ohhhh.... yesssssss.....

    Teacher: Pappu.... !!! I said LION not LEONE

    Pappu: O Teri!!!! Sorry mam...
  • Oral Sex for Birth Control

    A married couple in New York's "Little Italy" went to their Priest to discuss birth control, since they already had seven children.

    The husband inquired if perhaps oral sex would be an acceptable substitute in the eyes of the Church.

    The Priest explained that it was still considered a perverted act and a sin; totally banned according to their faith.

    The wife spoke up fuming, "Look Father, you no play-a da game, you no make-a da rules!"