• BJ for Sore Throat

    "You don't look so good today, Bambi," said Barbie.

    "You're right," said Bambi. "I feel like I'm coming down with something. My throat really hurts."

    Barbie suggested, "You know, whenever I have a sore throat I give my husband oral sex and the next day I feel great."

    Bambi carefully considered this. The next day Barbie noticed that Bambi looked better.

    "You look much better today. Did you take my suggestion?"

    Bambi replied, "I sure did. It worked great. And your husband just couldn't believe that it was your idea!"
  • A Hot Thai Nurse

    After experiencing the discomfort and embarrassment of a prostate test on the National Health Service in the UK, a friend of mine decided to have his next test carried out while visiting Thailand where the beautiful nurses are rather more gentle and accommodating.

    As usual he was asked to strip off, he lay naked on his side on the bed and the nurse began the examination.

    "At this stage of the procedure it's quite normal to get an erection" said the nurse.

    "I haven't got an erection" said the man.

    "No, but I have" replied the nurse.
  • Making Out in BMW

    A couple were making love in a 5 Series BMW when the bloke's back seized up. The ambulance men were afraid to move him in case of serious damage to his spine. So the police decided to use the 'jaws of life'.

    They simply cut the entire top of the car off so the patient could be safely lifted out without bending.

    When the ambulance departed the girl sat weeping beside the abbreviated 5 Series BMW.

    Feeling sorry for her, a cop patted her on the shoulder. "He'll be all right," he reassured her.

    The girl rounded on him savagely, "Oh, sod him," she exclaimed. "How am I going to explain to my husband what happened to his BMW?"
  • A Working Girl

    A guy is sitting in a bar, absolutely drooling at a pretty young thing in her short, pink mini-dress. Using the time-honored icebreaker, he sends her a drink.

    "How lucky am I," he thinks, as she gets up to come sit next to him. They strike up a wonderful conversation.

    Finally the girl turns to him and says, "Look, you seem like a really nice guy, so I have to tell you that I'm a working girl. I get two hundred dollars for what you think you'll ply out of me with liquor."

    He replies, "I have no problem with the money but, since you were so straight forward I must tell you that when I come, I go nuts. I bite, scratch, kick, punch, pull hair, break furniture and just plain destroy the place."

    "Oh my God! How long does that last" she asked?

    "Just until I get my two hundred bucks back," he replied.