• Visiting The Louvre Museum

    A Frenchwoman took her young daughter to the Louvre. As they stood before a statue of a nude male, the child pointed at its penis and asked, "Mama, what's that?"

    "Oh, nothing, Cherie."

    "I want one," said the child. The mother tried to focus her daughter's attention on a more suitable subject, but the little girl persisted.

    "I want one. I want one like that one," she kept repeating.

    Finally, her mother said, "If you're a good girl and stop talking about it now, I promise you that when grow up, you will have one."

    "And if I'm bad?"

    Her mother sighed. "Then you will have many!"
  • Erectile Dysfunction

    Husband: I must say that you are very pretty to be a waitress. Can I know your name please...?

    Waitress: That is very nice of you, sir. My name is Isabella.

    Husband: Nice name...!

    Wife: Honey, why don't you tell her about the erectile dysfunction that you suffer from?

    Husband: Right, honey...! I don't know how I forgot my manners.

    Wife: Happens...!

    Husband: Isabella, let me introduce you to the erectile dysfunction that I suffer from. This is my wife Julie.
  • Help With Counting Money

    Patel: Remove your clothes.

    Wife: Why Remove my clothes?

    Patel: Just do and come beside me on the bed.

    Wife: Okay they are off.

    Patel: Nice sweetie. What about your bra and panties? Remove them also.

    Wife: Please I am not in the mood.

    Patel: Just remove your panties and bra and stop all this your everyday 'not in the mood story'!

    Wife: Okay they are off. What's next?

    Patel: I just want you to help me count my money. Every time you help me count the money while your clothes are on, I always find shortages!!!
  • Eye Colour

    A man was talking to his friend at the bar.

    The friend said, "Did you know that 9 out of 10 women with brown eyes cheat on their husbands?"

    "No, I didn't know that," The man replied.

    "So what color are your wife's eyes?" asked the friend.

    The man replied, "I'm too drunk to remember. Geez, I better go home and find out."

    So the man hurries home to find his wife in bed and asleep. The man carefully lifts his wife's eyelid and exclaims, "Oh my God! Brown!"

    Suddenly, another man pops out from under the covers and exclaims, "How did you know I was here?"