• A couple had been divorced for about 6 months, but still remained good friends. This worked out pretty good since the both lived in the same apartment building.

    One day he slipped on the ice and broke his arm. Later he met his ex-wife in the elevator and she asked if there was anything she could do to help.

    He responded, "Well yes, if it's not to much trouble, could you help me take a bath?"

    She readily agreed, and soon after she began washing him she saw a gradual erection began to appear.

    "Look John," she exclaimed happily, "It still recognizes me!!!"
  • Sleeping With Friend's Wife

    Jack goes to his friend Mike and says, "I'm sleeping with the priest's wife.. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?"

    The friend doesn't like it but being a friend, he agrees.

    After mass, he starts talking to the priest, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied.

    Finally the priest gets annoyed and asks Mike what he's really up to.

    Mike, feeling guilty, finally confesses to the priest, "My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied."

    The priest smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Mike's shoulder and says, "U BETTER HURRY HOME NOW.... MY WIFE DIED A YEAR AGO."
  • I Feel Guilty

    Sherryl, a pert and pretty nurse took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked.

    "Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It's got so that every time I date one of the young doctors here, I end up shagging him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week."

    "I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your will power and resolve in this matter."

    "NO!!!" exclaimed the nurse. "I want you to fix it so I won't feel guilty and depressed afterward!"
  • One Word or Two?

    An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time.

    Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married.

    Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.

    Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.

    "How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather tentatively.

    "I would like it infrequently' she replied.

    The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, leaned over towards her and whispered, "Is that one word or two?"