|A bartender is sitting behind his bar when a well dressed but obviously intoxicated man stumbles in.|
"Bartender! A drink for everyone, a drink for me, and a drink for yourself!" The man yells as he approaches.
Bartender pours all the drinks, the the whole bar cheers, they all drink.
Bartender hands the bill to the man, and he just shrugs and says, "Oh I didn't bring my wallet with me tonight, sorry."
The bartender proceeds to beat the living daylights out of the man and throws him out.
Next night, bartender is again behind his bar when the same well dressed but intoxicated man stumbles in.
"Bartender! A drink for everyone, a drink for me, and a drink for yourself!" The man happily announces as he approaches.
Bartender thinks, "This guy cant be that stupid, he probably came to pay. Now I feel bad for beating him so hard previous night."
He pours all the drinks, the the whole bar cheers, they all drink. Bartender hands the bill to the man, and he again shrugs and says, "Oh I didn't bring my wallet with me again, sorry."
The bartender proceeds to beat the man even harder and kicks him out.
Third night in the row, bartender just cant believe his eyes when he sees the man return.
"Bartender! A drink for everyone, and a drink for me!" The man calls out as he approaches.
Bartender is fuming and grins sardonically, "What, no drink for ME tonight?"
The drunk looks at him and says, "Nah man, you get way too violent when you drink."
|A little girl was sitting next to her grandfather as he read her a bedtime story. From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach up and touch his wrinkled cheek. She touched her own cheek after she touched his.|
After a little while of thinking she asked, "Grandpa, did God make you?"
He looked at her and said, "Yes, sweetheart God made me a long time ago."
She paused for a few seconds and then asked, "Grandpa, did God make me too?"
He replied, "Yes, indeed pumpkin, God made you just a little while ago."
Feeling their respective faces again, she whispered to him, "God's getting better at it, isn't he?"
|Condolence in future will be like this...|
Jaane Wala Bahut Hi Achcha Insaan Tha,
Hamesha Online Rehta Tha,
Har Ek Ki Request Accept Kar Leta Tha,
Kabhi Bhi Apne Comments Se Kisi Ko Takleef Nahi Di,
Iss Ki Posts Badi Hee Jandaar Aur Mazedaar Hoti Thee,
Bade Dil Ka Malik Tha, Kabhi Kisi Ko Block Nahi Kiya,
Dosto Ki Selfies Dil Khol Kar Like Karta Tha, Aur Bahut Hee Achche Comments Deta Tha,
Ameero Se Share Aur Ghareebo Ko Tag Kiya Karta Tha,
Jab Maut Aayi Tab Bhi Facebook Per Hi Baitha Hua Tha.
Bohat Hi Achcha Aur Logon Se Ghulne-Milne Wala Banda Tha.
Uski DP (Display Picture) Hum Sab 13 Days Tak Apne Group Main Lagayenge...! Yahi Hamari Sacchi Shradhanjali Hogi..!!!
|1. While seasoning, if you put few drops of whisky, the oil doesn't burn.|
2. While kneading dough, put a few drops of beer and the chapatis will be golden brown.
3. If you add a few drops of vodka in paneer, it will not spoil in summer time.
4. Putting red wine in dal will enhance the taste.
If you can't manage the above, Try this... for guranteed success
Pour 4 pegs in your husband's mouth, then it doesn't matter how you cook....