• Single or Married ?

    A man got a call from unknown number.
    Girl: Hi, are you single???
    Man: Yes, but who are you ???
    Ans: Your wife.... Aaj Ghar Aana Tab Bataoungi...

    Another call from unknown number...
    Girl: Are you married ??
    Man: Yes, but who are you ??
    Girl: Your girlfriend,... you cheat!!!
    Man: Sorry baby, I thought it was my wife.
    Ans: Wife Hi Hoon Kamine, Aaj Tu Bas Ghar Aaja.
  • The Way Women Think

    Husband's Message (by text):

    "Darling, I got hit by a car outside the office. Paula brought me to the hospital. They have been doing tests and taking X-rays. The blow to my head though very strong, should not have any serious or lasting effect but, I have three broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture of the left leg and they may have to amputate my right foot. Fingers crossed!"

    Wife's Response:
    "Who's Paula?"
  • The Haircut

    A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

    His father said he'd make a deal with his son, "You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about the car."

    The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer and they agreed on it.

    After about six weeks his father said, "Son, you've brought your grades up and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm disappointed you haven't had your hair cut." The boy said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair, and there's even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair."

    Love the Dad's reply!
    "Did you also notice that they all walked everywhere they went?"
  • A Visit to the Dentist

    A dentist had an old lady patient who was very hard to handle. As soon as she sat in the chair, she panicked and would clamp her mouth shut so firmly that he couldn't get it open to work on her teeth.

    One afternoon, on about the third try to treat the old lady, the dentist figured out a way to get the job done. He excused himself from the old lady, went back to the reception desk and told his receptionist that as soon as he was ready to work on the old lady's teeth, she was to move up behind her and jab her in the rear with a long pin. Well the receptionist did what she was told, and sure enough, the old lady opened her mouth to holler and that opening, maintained with a pry to keep it that way, got the job done.

    Finally finishing with his work, the dentist said, "Well now, that wasn't so bad, was it?"

    "Nope, not so bad," said the old lady. "But I'll tell you this, I never expected to feel the pain of a toothache way down in my ass."
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT