• Relationship Workshop

    A workshop was done on women's relationship. They were told to send a message written "I Love You" to their husbands.

    Top 10 replies from husbands are:

    1. Are you alright? Feeling sick or something? Should I bring some medicine?

    2. What happened? Did you again hit my car?
    3. I am sorry, I didn't get it.

    4. What did you do this time? I'm not going to leave you.
    5. ?????
    6. Do not make things up! Just tell me now how much do you want for your shopping?
    7. You are telling me for whom this message was or I am going to kill you.
    8. O god!!! Again your mom-dad are here?

    9. I told you don't drink too much.

    And the ultimate one:
    10. May I know who is this?
  • Running Out Of Gas!

    Sister Marry was truly a religious woman. Besides for her duties as a nun, she was also very active in various hospitals visiting sick patients and taking care of all their needs.

    So it was no surprise that one day when she ran out of petrol, the only container she could find to put the gas into was a bedpan.

    Sister Mary happily walked to the closest petrol station filled up the bedpan and headed back to her car.

    Luck would have it that as Sister Mary started tipping the petrol into the fuel tank, the traffic light turned red and she had quite a large audience witnessing the spectacle.

    Just when she finished pouring in the last drops a fellow opened up his window and hollered, "I swear! If that car starts I'm becoming a monk!"
  • Wine Wisdom

    To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine... and those who don't and are always seen with a bottle of water in their hand.

    As Ben Franklin said:
    In wine there is wisdom,
    In beer there is freedom,
    In water there is bacteria.

    In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria found in feces.

    In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

    However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

    Remember:
    Water = Poop,
    Wine = Health.

    Therefore we conclude: It's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit.

    VERIFICATION: BOTH THE HOUSE AND SENATE DRINK A LOT OF WATER WHILE IN SESSION. THIS EXPLAINS THE RESULTS THEREIN.

    There is no need to thank me for this valuable information, I'm doing it as a public service.
    Have a nice day and enjoy a real drink!!!
  • Role Reversal

    Ek Admi Ne Bhagvaan Se Pucha: Main Sara Din Kaam Kartaa Hoon... Apne Parivaar Ke Liye Itni Mehnat Karta Hoon Meri Patni Pura Din Ghar Mein Rah Kar Karti Kyaa Hai? Uski Zindagi Bahut Saral Hai... Aisa Kyun Prabhu?

    Bhagvaan Bole: Kyun Na 2 Din Ke Liye Tumhe Patni Bana Dete Hain Aur Tumhari Biwi Ko Pati??

    Aadmi Maan Gayaa.

    Agle Din Subah 5 Baje Alaarm Baj Gayaa... Usne Uth Kar Bachchon Ka Breakfast Aur Lunch (Tiffin) Banaya, Phir Bachchon Ko Ready Kar Ke School Bheja. Phir Patni Ko Uthaa Kar Uska Naashta Banaya... Patni Ke Jaane Ke Baad Ghar Saaf Kiyaa... Abhi Naashta Karne Baitha Hi Tha Ki Kaamwaali Aa Gayi... Vo Gayi Toh Bachchon Ke School Se Aane Ka Time Ho Gaya. Unhe Khana Khilayaa Aur Homevark Karane Baith Gaya. Shaam Ke Khaane Ki Taiyaari Kar Ke Bachchon Ko Evening Classs Mein Le Gaya.
    Shaam Ko Patni Ke Aane Par Khana Parosa Toh Patni Ne Usamein 4 Kamiyaan Nikaal Di... Agle Din Subah Uthakar Sabse Pehle Bhagvaan Se Prarthna Kee: Bhagvaan Mujhe Vaapas Adami Bana Do... Mujhe Samajh Aa Gaya Ki Aurat Kitna Kaam Karti Hai...

    Kahaani Mein Twist.. Bhagvan Bole: Vaise Toh Tujhe 2 Din Ke Liye Aurat Bananaa Tha, Lekin Ab Main Chaah Kar Bhi Tujhe Aadmi Nahin Bana Sakta.

    Aadmi: Kyun Prabhu...???

    Bhagvaan: Kyunki Kal Raat Ko Tum Pregnant Ho Gaye Ho.
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