• Banta Quickies

    Banta Apne Guruji Ka Pravachan Sunne Gaya.
    Guruji Bole: Jo Jo Swarg Jaana Chahta Hai Vo Apna Haath Khada Kare.
    Banta Ki Gharwali Aur Saas Ne Apne Haath Upar Utha Diye.
    Guruji Ne Banta Se Pucha: Kya Tum Swarg Nahin Jaana Chahte?
    Banta: Guruji, Yeh Dono Chali Jayengi Toh Yahin Par Swarg Ho Jayega.

    Aaj Banta Ko Ek Ladki Ka Message Aya.
    Girl: Hi......
    Banta: Hello
    Girl: How Are You?
    Banta: Fine
    Girl: Where Are You From?
    Banta: Hoshiarpur
    Girl: Aap Kitna Pade-Likhe Ho?
    Banta: Tumhare Jitna.
    Girl: Mere Jite!!! Matlab?
    Banta: Main Bhi Bas Itni Angreji Bol Kar Seedha Hindi Mein Shuru Ho Jata Hun...
    Girl: Mar Ja Kaminee... Tera Kcuh Nahin Hoga!!!

    Ghar Ka Kaam Time Se Aur Achche Tarike Se Nahi Ho Paa Raha Tha Toh Banta Apni Biwi Ko Bola: Kaam Ke Liye Koi Bai Hi Rakh Lete Hai?
    Preeto Gusse Se Boli: Nahi Chahiye.
    Banta: Kyun?
    Preeto: Achchi Tarah Jaanti Hun Mein Tumhe Aur Tumhari Tharki Aadaton Ko, Main Bhi Toh Bai Bankar Hi Aayi Thi Kamine.

    Ek Diwaar Par Likha Tha: Yahaan Kutte Susu Karte Hain.
    Banta Ko Badi Zor Se Susu Aaya Thha, Usne Idhar Udhar Dekha Ki Koi Bhi Nahi Dekh Raha Toh Waha Susu Kar Diya.
    Phir Muskura Kar Bola: Ise Kehte Hai Dimaag, Susu Maine Kiya Naam Kutte Ka Aaya.
  • Log Kya Kahenge...

    Gharwale Ladki Ki Marzi Ke Bina Ladki Ki Shaadi Kar Rahe The.

    Ladki Apni Maa Se Kehti Hai: Mammi, Main Ye Shaadi Nahi Karungi Aur Agar Tumne Mujhse Zabardasti Ki To Main Ghar Se Bhaag Jaungi Aur Apne Boyfriend Se Marriage Kar Lungi.

    Maa Rote Hue: Beti Ye Kya Keh Rahi Hai Tu, Maine Tere Baap Se Bhaag Ke Shaadi Ki, Teri Badi Behan Aur Teri Bua Ne Bhi Bhaag Ke Shaadi Ki, Tera Bhai Naukrani Ke Saath Bhaga Aur Teri Maasi Ek Dukandaar Ke Saath Bhaag Gayi, Tera Chacha Apni Padosan Ke Saath Aur Uski Ladki Apne Tutuion Wale Teacher Ke Saath Bhag Gayi.
    Aur Toh Aur Tera Baap Do Baar Padosan Ke Sath Bhaag Gaya Aur Ab Tu Bhi Bhaag Jayegi Toh Iss Ghar Ki Kya Ijjat Reh Jayegi, Log Kya Kahenge... Beta Hamari Izzat Ka Kuch Toh Khayal Kar.
  • Painless Tooth Removal

    A Sindhi went to a dentist for tooth extraction and first enquired about cost.

    Dentist said it's 1200 per extraction. The Sindhi thought it was too much and asked about cheaper methods.

    The dentist said: Yes, it can be done without anesthesia and will cost only Rs. 300, but it would be very very painful.

    Sindhi said: Ok Doctor, do it without anesthesia.

    The dentist removed the tooth without anesthesia and during the entire procedure the Sindhi sat quietly, even smiling a little.

    The dentist was not only surprised but was quite impressed and said: I have never seen such a brave patient like you. I don't even want my fees, here, instead take this Rs. 500 as a reward, you've taught me such a powerful lesson today about mastering one's pain and feelings !!!

    In the evening he met his fellow dentists and told everyone about his amazing Sindhi patient. Out of all doctors, one doctor jumped up and shouted: That rascal Sindhi first came to me... I gave him anesthesia and asked him to wait outside for half an hour ! After half an hour when I called him he had left !!!!
  • Drinking Problem!

    Pappu goes up to his mom and says, "Mommy, I have a drinking problem. I need help."

    Jeeto, of course, freaks out and yells, "How did this happen?!"

    She turns to her husband and says, "This is all your fault! You're the one that comes home drunk and gives such a bad example to all of our children."

    Santa yells back, "Oh, I'm the one that does it? I do nothing but give to this family! Your the one that was drinking beer while breast feeding when I told you not to!"

    Jeeto yells, "Get out! You are a horrible person and I never want to see you again!"

    He grabs his collection of stuff and yells, "Fine! I don't need you!" and he walks out of the door.

    Pappu is standing there crying, not knowing what to think of the situation other than he knows his dad is gone.

    Jeeto turns to him and says, "Don't cry Pappu, it will be fine... Now just tell me all about your drinking problem and we will get you some help."

    Pappu says, "Well... the problem is, if Simar drinks 675 ml of orange juice, Pinky drinks 545 ml, and Manu drinks 860 ml, how much orange juice did they drink?"
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