• I Paint What I Feel

    Pappu goes to her first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings.

    One is a huge canvas that has black with yellow blobs of paint splattered all over it.

    The next painting is a murky gray color that has drips of purple paint streaked across it.

    Pappu walks over to the artist and says, "I don't understand your paintings."
    "I paint what I feel inside me," explains the artist.

    Pappu thinks for a while and said, "Have you ever tried ENO?"
  • Behind every successful...

    During a company's annual family trip to a crocodile farm in Thailand... the eccentric Boss dared any of his employees to jump into the crocodiles infested pond and swim to the shore.

    Anyone who survived the swim will be rewarded with 25 million but if killed by the crocs 2 million will be given to the next of kin.

    For a long period of time no one dared take up the challenge then suddenly a man jumped in...and swam frantically for his life towards shore pursued by the crocs and luckily he made it unscathed.
    When he managed to recover his breath... the man, who became instant millionaire, shouted asking who pushed him into the pond..... it was his wife who did it.!!!

    And from that day...that was how the phrase... "Behind every successful man...there's a woman"...came about !!!
  • How Are You Feeling???

    Farmer Brown decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company (responsible for the accident) to court. In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning Farmer Brown.

    "Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine'?" asked the lawyer.

    Farmer Brown responded, "Well I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the ....... "

    "I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted, "just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine'!"

    Farmer Brown said, "Well I had just gotten Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road...... "

    The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question."

    By this time the Judge was fairly interested in Farmer Brown's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite mule Bessie."

    Brown thanked the Judge and proceeded, "Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side."

    He continued, "I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting real bad and didn't want to move. However, I could hear ole Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans.

    "Shortly after the accident a highway patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes. Then the patrolman came across the road with his gun in his hand and looked at me."

    Finally, farmer Brown came to the end of the story. "The patrolman looked at me and said, 'Your mule was in such bad shape I had to shoot her. How are YOU feeling'?"
  • Family Trip To Australia

    Last month during Christmas a family from Kanpur, was on holidays in Australia.

    Apart from his wife and two children, this man from Kanpur was also accompanied by his old age father.

    They were traveling on one of the free ways. This Indian Family was in their car and was followed by a Local Aussie Lady, driving at a safe distance.

    Suddenly the Aussie Lady saw a head of an old man coming out of the window and vomiting blood.

    She took a quick action and informed the 000 for help. In no time, there appeared an Air Ambulance Helicopter.

    The well trained staff quickly shifted that old man on the stretcher. Oxygen supply started. Doctors started examining him. Sometime later, the old man was declared safe and fit to travel again.

    Kudos to Quick Help and Well Done The Aussie Lady.

    But for these services, our Kanpur man had to pay AUD 3500.

    With these unplanned heavy financial charges, the Kanpur man was in shock and he blasted on his Old Aged Father: Gutkha Kha Kar Khidki Ke Bahar Pichkari Maarne Ki Kya Zaroorat Thi?