• Fake and Real Friends

    FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
    REAL FRIENDS: Is the reason you have no food.

    FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
    REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.

    FAKE FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
    REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.

    FAKE FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
    REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say 'I'M HOME!'

    FAKE FRIENDS: Are for a while.
    REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

    FAKE FRIENDS: will talk bad to the person who talks bad about you.
    REAL FRIENDS: Will knock the person out that talked bad about you.
  • Husband & Wife Humour

    Patni: Chalo Ek Khel Khelte Hain... Main Chhupti Hoon Aur Aap Mujhe Dhoondhna. Agar Aapne Dhoondh Liya Toh Main Aapke Saath Shopping Karne Chalungi.
    Pati: Aur Agar Nahin Dhoondh Paya Toh ?
    Patni: Aaisa Mat Kaho Jaanu...... Bas Darwaje Ke Peechhe Hee Chhupoongi ...!!!

    Ek Aurat Apne Boyfriend Ke Saath Bazaar Mein Ghoom Rahi Thee Ki Tabhi Uska Pati Mila Gaya.
    Pati Ne Boyfriend Ko Peetna Shuru kar Diya.
    Aurat: Maaro Saaley Ko... Apni Biwi Ko Kabhi Ghumaane Le Jaata Nahi Aur Doosron Ki Biwion Ko Le Jaata Hai.
    Tabhi Boyfriend Ko Josh Aa Gaya Aur Woh Pati Ko Peetne Shuru Kar Deta Hai.
    Aurat: Maar Saale Ko !!! Khud Toh Kabhi Ghumaane Le Jaata Nahi Aur Doosron Ko Bhi Nahin Ghumaane Deta!!!

    Husband: Tumhare Shaadi Se Pehle Kitne Boyfriend The??
    Wife silent...
    Husband Chilla Ke: Mein Iss Khamoshi Ka Kya Matlab Samjhun?
    Wife: Haaye Rabba... Gin Toh Rahi Hun.... Chilla Kyun Rahe Ho...

    Pati: Saab, Meri Patni Gum Ho Gayi Hai!!!
    Postmaster: Oye, Andhaa Hai Kya ??? Ye Post Office Hai, Police Station Jaa Na.
    Pati: Maaf Karna Bhai, Kyaa Karoon, Khushi Ke Maare Kuchh Samajh Nahi Aa Rahaa Ki Kidhar Jaauun ???`
  • 5 Idiots!!!

    A King of a Kingdom called his Prime Minister and asked, like there are Brilliant people in his State will there be Idiots available?

    Minister said there will be.

    King then ordered his Minister to go around the State search and bring 5 of such Idiots and present to him in the Council.

    Minister was awestruck since you can identify brilliant people by conducting some form of competition, but how to identify Idiots. However he goes around the State and after a month comes back with 2 such people. There after following is the conversation between King and Minister.

    King: Dear Minister I think you are poor in counting, I asked for 5 people and you have brought only 2.

    Minister: Your Highness please let me explain and then you will know yourself.

    King: OK. Go ahead.

    Minister: When I was going around the State I found this guy carrying a huge Gunny Bag on his head and travelling in a Bullock Cart. When I asked he said that if he keeps the bag in the Cart it will be overloaded and hurt the Bulls. I realised he is the 5th Idiot and brought him to you.

    King: Excellent. Next.

    Minister: I saw the other guy was taking his Buffalo to the roof top of his house for grazing where grass was found grown. I realised he is the 4th Idiot and brought him to you.

    King: Fine. Next.

    Minister: When there are so many problems in the functioning of this kingdom, leaving those entire aside I have been going around the State for a month wasting my time in searching for Idiots, hence I am the 3rd Idiot.

    King: Laughs out loud. Next.

    Minister: Instead of solving all the problems that are there in the Kingdom, you have been looking for Idiots in your State, hence you are the 2nd Idiot.

    Hearing this entire Council was scared and there was pin drop silence.

    King: Fine there is truth in your statement. Who is the 1st Idiot?

    Minister: Your Highness when there are so much of work in the Office and Home to attend to, leaving all this aside person who is reading this Story to know who is the 1st Idiot in 'What's App' is the 1st Idiot.
  • Suicide... Suicide...

    Ek Wife Ne Subah Uthte Hi Apne Pati Ko Pankhe Se Rassi Baandhte Dekha, Toh Ghabrakar Pucha: Arey, Yeh Aap Kya Kar Rahe Ho???

    Husband Ne Dukhi Swar Mein Kaha: Mein Teri Roz Roz ki Naye Kapde Dilaane Ki Pharmaish Se Tang Aa Gaya Hun, Isliye Suicide Kar Raha Hun.

    Ye Sunte Hi Wife Ne Zor Zor Se Rona Start Kar Diya, Aur Boli: Jaatey Jaatey Ek White Suit Toh Dilwa Do, Varna Terahvin Pe Kya Pehanungi????