|During the war between Israel and the Arab Countries an Arabic plane was shot down. The pilot was captured and the Israelis tries to get him to tell all technical details about the plane.|
"How fast can it fly?"
The pilot says nothing and the Israelis gives him a good beating.
"How many rockets does the plane carry?"
Again the pilot doesn't responds and he get another good beating.
"What is the maximum altitude of flying?"
The pilot responds with silence, and get another beating. This goes on and on and the Israelis get nothing out of the Arabic pilot so they decide to release him.
When the pilot returned home he was considered to be a national hero and he get interviewed by a reporter. The reporter asks the pilot if he has any tips to other pilots if they get caught.
"Make sure you know all the technical details about the planes, otherwise they beat the crap out of you!"
|Mom: Beta where are you now? It's 1.00 AM na Beta, come home fast!|
Son: Who's This ???
Mom: Arre O Murde!! Zaleel. Kaha Hai Re Ttu? Itti Raat ho Gayi Na, Kidar Mara Re. Awara Gardi Karte. Jaldi Ghar Ku Aaa.
Son: Aji ammi Tum Hai ??? Iti Izzat Se Baat Karre Toh Mai Samjha Ki ABBA Dusri Shadi Kar Liye. Abhi Aaroo.
|Budget cuts to the Defence force forced the training team to start doing mock combat using no explosives, guns, or basically any equipment what-so-ever, so when it came to a training scenario, the Sergeant in charge tells his recruits that they are under imaginary fire, and what do they do?|
So all of the recruits except one scatter and get down behind "stuff", and get into returning fire positions. The Sergeant notices this one recruit standing out in the open, quite relaxed and unfazed.
Yelling, the Sergeant asks, "What the devil do you think you're doing? You're under fire!"
So the recruit takes one step to the left and remains still.
Now the Sergeant's really annoyed. He yells again, "What the Hell are you doing? You're under imaginary fire, take cover!"
The recruit turns to him and replies, "I'm taking cover behind this imaginary tree Sergeant!"
|A rabbi, a minister, and a priest were playing poker when the police raided the game.|
Turning to the priest, the lead police officer said, "Father Murphy, were you gambling?"
Turning his eyes to heaven, the priest whispered, "Lord, forgive me for what I am about to do."
To the police officer, he then said, "No, officer; I was not gambling."
The officer then asked the minister, "Pastor Johnson, were you gambling?"
Again, after an appeal to heaven, the minister replied, "No, officer; I was not gambling."
Turning to the rabbi, the officer again asked, "Rabbi Goldstein, were you gambling?"
Shrugging his shoulders, the rabbi replied, "With whom?"