• Where's My Goat?

    There were these two guys out hiking when they came upon an old, abandoned mine shaft. Curious about its depth they threw in a pebble and waited for the sound of it striking the bottom, but they heard nothing.

    They went and got a bigger rock, threw it in and waited. Still nothing.

    They searched the area for something larger and came upon a railroad tie. With great difficulty, the two men carried it to the opening and threw it in. While waiting for it to hit bottom, a goat suddenly darted between them and leapt into the hole!

    The guys were still standing there with astonished looks upon their faces from the actions of the goat when a man walked up to them.

    He asked them if they had seen a goat anywhere in the area and they said that one had just jumped into the mine shaft in front of them!

    The man replied, "Oh no. That couldn't be my goat, mine was tied to a railroad tie."
  • Good Qualities

    One day, Birbal was talking of a dinner he had eaten the day before. In doing so, he described brinjal (baingan) as be -gun i.e. without any good qualities.

    Akbar, who at the very moment was passing by, overheard this and started praising the qualities of the brinjal as bahu-gun i.e one without myriad qualities.

    Birbal promptly agreed.

    Thereupon, Akbar remonstrated with Birbal and asked him how Birbal could contradict himself.

    Birbal, with his famous presence of mind, retorted, "But Your Highness, I am your servant and not of the brinjal!"
  • Living With Sisters!

    The Matchmaker goes to see Mr. Avery, a confirmed bachelor for many years.
    "Mr. Avery, don't leave it too late. I have exactly the one you need. You only have to say the word and you'll meet and be married in no time!" says the Matchmaker.

    "Don't bother," replies Mr. Avery, "I've two sisters at home who look after all my needs."

    "That's all well and good, but all the sisters in the world cannot fill the role of a wife."

    "I said 'two sisters'. I didn't say they were MY sisters."
  • Military Personal Insurance

    Airman Jackson was assigned to the induction center, where he advised new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance.

    It wasn't long before Captain Haverty noticed that Airman Jackson was having a staggeringly high success-rate, selling insurance to nearly 100% of the recruits he advised.

    Rather than asking him about this, the Captain stood at the back of the room and listened to Jackson's sales pitch.

    Jackson explained the basics of GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said, "If you are killed in a battle and have a GI Insurance, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. But, if you don't have a GI insurance and get killed in the battle, the government only has to pay a maximum of $6000."
    "Now," he concluded, "which group do YOU think they're gonna send into battle first?"