• Not a Quitter!

    A guy walks into the human resources department of a large company and hands the executive his application.

    The executive begins to scan the sheet, and notices that the applicant has been fired from every job he has ever held.

    "I must say," says the executive, "your work history is terrible. You've been fired from every job."

    "Yes," says the man.

    "Well," continues the executive, "there's not much positive in that."

    "Hey!" says the guy as he pokes the application. "At least I'm not a quitter."
  • An Important Call

    The father of a teenage daughter was concerned with the amount of time she spent on the telephone; not so much for the time she wasted (he had given up on that long ago), but because nobody else could use the phone.

    So, as a happy solution, he had a telephone installed for her with her own private number and directory listing.

    Two or three days after her telephone had been installed, he came home to find her stretched out on the floor with her feet on the living room couch and chatting away on the family telephone. Her own telephone was resting silently on her dresser.

    "Why are you using our telephone," he yelled. "Why aren't you talking on your own telephone?"

    "I can't," she said, "I'm expecting an important call on my phone."
  • Grandma's Cooking Secret

    A little girl was watching her mother prepare a fish for dinner. Her mother cut the head and tail off the fish and then placed it into a baking pan. The little girl asked her mother why she cut the head and tail off the fish.

    Her mother thought for a while and then said, "I've always done it that way - that's how Grandma did it."

    Not satisfied with the answer, the little girl went to visit her Grandma to find out why she cut the head and tail off the fish before baking it.

    Grandma thought for a while and replied, "I don't know. My mother always did it that way."

    So the little girl and the Grandma went to visit Great Grandma to find ask if she knew the answer.

    Her Great Grandma thought for a while and said, "Because, in my day, we had only a small kitchen, and my baking pan was too small to fit in the whole fish."
  • For Word Lovers

    These are written by an Indian Lexophile

    1. Mujhe Ek Ghante Se Auto Nahi Mila, Shayad Bhagwaan Meri paRICKSHAW Le Raha Hai.

    2. My Body Is In Office, But My Mind Is SOMVAR Else... #Monday Blues.

    3. I Am Feeling Too Lazy To Meet My Friends. AALSI Them Later.

    4. Son: Dad, Rum Piyoge?
    Dad: Oye Puttar 'Bacar'di Gal Na Kar...

    5. If You Eat Fiery Garlic Pickle Before Class, You'll Learn A Valuable Lehsun.

    6. Weight Loss Frustration... Pran Jaaye Par Wajan Naa Jaye!

    7. Saw a Line of Hyundai Sonatas Parked on An Empty Road. Asked someone There: Itna Sonata Kyun Hai Bhai???

    8. If Johny Depp Does Devdas, There'll be Jack's Paro.

    9. A Daughter Is The Perfect Child. A Son Is Just A Beta Version.

    10. When in Chennai, Many North Indians Wonder: Ye Kaahan Aa Gaye Hum, Yoon Hee South South Chalte...

    11. She is Libra I Am Leo Humari Jodi Kuch Gemini.

    12. Decided To Go To A Italian Restaurant Kyunki Woh Ghar Ke PASTA.