• Kangaroo's High Jump

    A kangaroo at the Sydney zoo kept getting out of his enclosure every night.

    Knowing that mature kangaroos could hop very high, the zoo officials replaced the eight-foot fence with a ten-foot fence.

    He was out the next morning, just roaming around the zoo.

    They tore down the ten-foot fence and put up a fifteen-foot fence.

    He was out again the next morning.

    A twenty-foot fence was put up. Again he go out.

    When the fence was forty feet high, a camel in the next enclosure asked the kangaroo, "How high do you think they'll go?"

    The kangaroo said, "About a thousand feet, unless somebody thinks to lock the gate at night!"
  • Why don't men ever listen?

    A man bought a kitten and tried to teach it to speak. Everyday for six years he taught it the alphabet.

    For hours and hours he'd say to the cat, "Repeat after me..." and then he would say a word, or a sentence.

    He was eagerly waiting the day when the cat would repeat the words. But alas, the only thing the cat did for those six years was looking back at his teacher.

    Then after six years, to his complete amazement, the cat said, "Look out, the roof is falling down!"

    Completely flabbergasted, the man just stared at the cat.

    Seconds later, he was crushed to death by the falling roof.

    The cat shook his head and said, "For six years he tried so hard to get me to speak. Then, when I did, he wouldn't listen!"
  • High Hopping Kangaroo

    A kangaroo kept getting out of his enclosure at the zoo. Knowing that he could hop high, the zoo officials put up a ten-foot fence.

    He was out the next morning, just sauntering around the zoo. A twenty-foot fence was put up. Again he got out.

    When the fence was forty feet high, a camel in the next enclosure asked the kangaroo, "How high do you think they'll go?"

    The kangaroo said, "About a thousand feet, unless somebody locks the gate at night!"
  • Crows Aren't So Smart

    The Department of Tourism clean-up crew recently found over 200 dead crows off and along NH1 near Delhi, and there was concern that they may have died from some sort of Covid/Avian Flu.

    A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Avian/Covid related. The cause of death in fact appeared to be from vehicular impacts.

    However, during analysis it was noted that varying colours of paint appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analysing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with motorbikes, while only 2% were killed by cars.

    The ICMR then hired an Ornithological Behaviourist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of motorbike kills versus car kills.

    The Ornithological Behaviourist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger. They discovered that while all the look-out crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Bike".