|Bill Clinton is visiting a school. In one class, he asks the students if anyone could give him an example of a "tragedy."|
One little boy stands up and offers "If my best friend who lives next door was playing in the street when a car came along and killed him, that would be a tragedy."
"No," Clinton says, "that would be an ACCIDENT."
A girl raises her hand. "If a school bus carrying fifty children drove off cliff, killing everyone involved ... that would be a tragedy."
"I m afraid not," explains Clinton.
"That is what we would call a GREAT LOSS."
The room is silent; none of the other children volunteer.
"What ?" asks Clinton, "Isn`t there anyone who can give an example of a tragedy?"
Finally a boy in the back raises his hand. In a timid voice, he says: "If an airplane carrying Bill and Hillary Clinton were blown up by a bomb, THAT would be a tragedy."
"Wonderful! " Clinton beams. "Marvelous! And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?"
"Well ," says the boy, " because it wouldn t be an accident and it certainly wouldn`t be a great loss!"
|Al Gore and the Clintons are flying on Air Force One. Bill looks at Al, chuckles and says, "You know, I could throw a $10,000 bill out the window right now and make one person very happy."|
Al shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, "Well, I could throw ten $1,000 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy".
Hillary tosses her perfectly sprayed hair and says, "Of course, then, I could throw one-hundred $100 bills out the window and make a hundred people very happy."
Chelsea rolls her eyes, looks at all of them and says, "I could throw all of you out the window and make the whole country happy".
| An American and A Russian were arguing about the virtues of communism and democracy. |
"Come on man!" said the American, "In a democracy you get to express your views. You have freedom. You know, I can anyday call President Bush an idiot!"
"What s so great about that," said the unimpressed Russian "so can I!"
|Q. What does JFK Jr. miss most about Martha s Vineyard? A. The runway. |
Q. What will they name the JFK Jr movie. ? A. Three funerals and a wedding.
Q. What was JFK Jr drinking at the time of the crash ? A. Ocean Spray.
Q. How did JFK Jr learn how to fly ? A. He took a crash course.
Q. How are the Kennedy s like oil? A. They don t mix well with water. Observation: Used to be that Kennedies drowned their women one at a time! Rumor: We hear JFK, Jr. has a new nickname: "Bob".
Q. Why didn t JFK, Jr. take a shower before he left for Martha s Vineyard? A. He said he d wash up on shore!
Q. Hear about Kennedy Airlines? A. Their motto is "Your luggage will arrive before you do!"
Q. Why was JFK, Jr. flying to the Vineyard? A. He wanted to crash his cousin s wedding. Finally
Q. Why aren t there more JFK jr. jokes out there A. They just haven t surfaced yet!
Q. What will it take to bring the Kennedy family back together? A. One more bullet! Let he who is without sin learn to loosen up and have some fun.