Communities Jokes

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Market Fluctuations!!!

I was standing in a small queue. There was a laday of Japanese descent in front of me she was there to exchange Yen for Dollars. She was a little irritated.

She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunad dolla fo yen. Today I only get hunad ninty? Why it change?"


The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations!"

The Japanese lady said, "Fluc you white people, too!"

Mallu Jokes...

Mallu jokes are in town!!!!!!!

What is the tax on a Mallu's income called?
Ingum Dax.

Where did the Malayali study?
In the ko-liage.
Why did the Malayali not go to ko-liage today?
He is very bissi.

Why did the Malayali buy an air-ticket?
To go to Thuubai, zimbly to meet his ungle in Gelff.

Why do Malayalis go to the Gelff?
To yearn meney.

What did the Malayali do when the plane caught fire?
He zimbly jembd out of the vindow.

How does a Malayali spell moon?
MOON - Yem Woh yet another Woh and Yen.

What is Malayali management graduate called?
Yem Bee Yae.

What does a Malayali do when he goes to America ?
He changes his name from Karunakaran to Kevin Curren.

What does a Malayali use to commute to office everyday?
An Oto.

Where does he pray?
In a Temble, Charch and a Maask.

Who is Bruce Lee's best friend?
A Malaya-Lee of coarse.

Name the only part of the werld, where Malayalis dont werk hard?
Kerala.

Why is industrial productivity so low in Kerala?
Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting, folding and re-tying the lungi.

Why did Saddam Hussain attack Kuwait?
He had a Mallu baby-sitter, who always used to say 'KEEP QUWAIT... KEEP QUWAIT'.

What is the Latest Malayali Punch Line?
"Frem Tea Shops To Koll Cenders, We Are Yevery Where"

Why aren't Mallus included in hockey and football teams?
Coz Whenever they get a corner, they set up a tea shop.

Now pass it on to 5 Mallus to get a free saamble of kokanet oil.
Pass it on 10 Mallus to get a free pack of Benana Chibbs....

The Indian Farmer

An Indian farmer walking through his field notices a foreigner drinking water from a pond, with his hand.

The Farmer shouts, "Woh paani mat peena. Usmein gayein, bhains or suwar nahate hain, potty karte hain, sussu karte hain! (which means, Don't drink that water, the cows, the buffaloes and the pigs shit and pee in it!)"

The man shouts back, "I'm a foreigner, I don't understand your bloody gibberish. Speak English, you bloody Indian idiot!"

The farmer shouts back in English, "Use two hands dude, you can drink more!"

Using a Wheelbarrow...

A White Man visited Ozoro Community in Delta State and saw the people carrying blocks on their heads from a far distance to a building site, they were building a town hall.

The White Man felt pity on them, donated a wheel barrow and travelled back.

One month later, the white man came back. He was surprised to see that the work was still slow, even with a wheel barrow.

He looked around and got shocked to see the on-coming wheel barrow with a guy pushing it, and another guy sitting inside it, smiling, with a block on his head.

Quotes

Do not brood over your past mistakes and failures as this will only fill your mind with grief, regret and depression. Do not repeat them in the future.

Trivia

The Iglesia Maradoniana (English: Church of Maradona; literally Maradonian Church) is a religion, created by fans of the retired Argentine football player Diego Maradona, who they believe to be the best player of all time.

Graffiti

Nowadays whatever is not worth saying is sung.