• Whistle !

    A Rajastani, who had spent his whole life in the desert, comes to visit a friend. He`d never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the rail tracks one day, he hears this whistle -- Whooee da Whoee! -- but doesn`t know what it is. Predictably, he`s hit and is thrown to the side of the tracks.
    It was only a glancing blow, so he was fortunate to receive some minor internal injuries, a few broken bones, and some bruises. After weeks in the hospital recovering, he`s at his friend`s house attending a party one evening.
    While in the kitchen, he suddenly hears the teakettle whistling. He grabs a iron rod from the nearby shelf and proceeds to batter and bash the teakettle into an unrecognizable lump of metal.
    His friend, hearing the ruckus, rushes into the kitchen, sees what`s happened and asks the desert man, "Why did you ruin my good tea kettle?"
    The desert man replies, "Man, you gotta kill these things when they`re small."
  • What a balance?

    God was in the process of creating the universe. And he was explaining his subordinates ...............
    "Look everything should be in balance. For every 10 deer`s there should be a lion. Look here my fellow angels, here is the country of the united states. I have blessed them with prosperity and money. But at the same time I have given them insecurity and tension.... And here is Africa. I have given them beautiful nature. But at the same time, I have given them climatic extremes.... And here is south America. I have given them lots of forests. But at the same time, I have given them lesser land so that they would have to cut off the forests... So you see fellows, everything should be in balance."
    One of the angels asked... "God, what is this beautiful country here?"
    God said "Aha...that is the crown piece of all. INDIA. My most precious creation. It has understanding and friendly people. Sparkling streams, serene mountains. A culture which speaks of the great tradition that they live. Technologically brilliant and with a heart of gold....."
    The angel was quite surprised "But God you said everything should be in balance."
    God replied "Look at the neighbors I gave them" !!
  • Are you serious?

    An Irish man walks into a bar and there`s a 7 foot tall Bar Tender there. The Bar Tender punches the Irish Man on the face. The Irish man falls on the floor.
    He finally get up and says to the Bar Tender, "Listen Mate, was that a joke or were you serious?"
    The bar tender replies, "I was serious"
    "You better have been serious, cos I don`t like jokes like that".
  • Time span...

    An american born Desi returned to India and hired a tourist cab for sight seeing. When taken to the Taj Mahal in Agra, he asked how many years it took to build it.
    The guide replied 20 years. The American desi remarked You guys are lazy, in America we can build some thing like this in 5 years.
    At Red Fort in Dehli he asked the same question. The guide reduced the period to impress him and said Ten years.
    Only ten years The American Desi retorted: Did not I say you guys are slow workers! In America we could have built it in 2 1/2 years.
    Same story everywhere. He admired the places but reduced the period to 1/4th.
    The guide got irritated by this young American Desi. Next day when they were near Qutab Minar the American Desi asked what is that tower? The guide replied I will have to go and find out. When I was passing by this side last evening there was nothing here.