Computer and Technology Jokes

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If Gods were in IT World

Brahma: System installer

Vishnu: System operator

Shiva: System programmer

Narad: Data Transmitter

Yama: Deleter

Apsara & Rambha: Virus

Ganapati: Anti virus

Hanuman: E-Mail

Chitragupta: Hard Disc

Saraswati: Internet explorer

Parvati: Mother Board

Lakshmi: ATM

Crazy people on my WhatsApp list

1. Someone on his status "Sleeping" since 3 Days! He's Probably dead.

2. Someone is "Driving" since 5 days! I guess he reached Dubai!!!

3. Someone's status is "Happy" since 1 Month. Living in Paradise???

4. Someone is always 'Available'. How free Are you?????

5. From first day their status is, 'Hey there! I'm using WhatsApp' I Know ! That's why you're on my list!

6. Someone writes "urgent calls only". Don't get it... Are you in the police or ambulance service?

7. Someone says, "Can't talk. Whatsapp only". Dude then throw away your phone.. You are not using the phone's Primary function 8. Someone is 'at d movies' for the past 6 weeks. Either he owns d theatre or sells popcorn there....

Computer Humor!

What does a baby computer call his father?
Data.

What is a computer`s first sign of old age?
Loss of memory.

What happened when the computer fell on the floor?
It slipped a disk.

Why was there a bug in the computer?
It was looking for a byte to eat.

What is a computer virus?
A terminal illness.

To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

The attention span of a computer is as long as its electrical cord.

Technology HURTS...

Be afraid! Infact very afraid, or be yourself. Technology can hurt you.

A wife was calling out for her husband from the kitchen to help her with the dishes, but did not get a response.

She went looking for him in the bed room and found hubby asleep on his files, tired of work.

She walked closer to him, looked at the innocent face, played with his hair softly, sweetly and.... then suddenly.... slapped his face!!!

The husband got up with a shock and asked, "what happened??!?!"

That's when the wife showed him his phone which showed: Last seen on whatsapp 1 minute ago.

Technology HURTS...

Quotes

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

Trivia

Ashok Kumar was a lab assistant in Bombay Talkies before he became an actor in 1936.

Graffiti

Actor - A man who tries to be everything but himself.