• Anesthesiology Bill

    Margie received a bill from the hospital for her recent surgery, and was astonished to see a $1200 fee for the anesthesiologist. She called his office to demand an explanation.

    "Is this some kind of mistake?" Margie asked when she got the doctor on the phone.

    "No, not at all," the doctor said calmly.

    "Well," said Margie, "that's awfully costly for knocking someone out."

    "Not at all," replied the doctor. "I knock you out for free. The 1200 dollars is for bringing you back around."
  • Will I Live To Be 80?

    I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well for my age".

    A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"

    He asked, "Well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer/wine?"

    "Oh no," I replied. "I'm not doing either."

    Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"

    I said, "No, my other Doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!"

    "Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?"

    "No, I don't," I said.

    He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?"

    "No,"I said. "I don't do any of those things."

    He looked at me and said, "Then why do you give a hoot if you live to be 80?"
  • Doubting Hubby's Character

    A Lady patient to the Doctor inside his examination room: Doctor can you please call my husband inside, I am not feeling comfortable.

    Doctor: Trust me lady, I am a Doctor and I am a Gentleman.

    Lady patient: No Sir, that's not the issue. Your beautiful receptionist is alone outside and my husband is neither a doctor nor a gentleman...!!!!!!
  • Doctor's Advice

    Yesterday I was talking to my doctor and after knowing my occupation he advised:

    You must exercise more. Don't buy cold drinks from stalls. Drink more plain water. Don't drive when going out. Take public transport or walk. Don't eat out.. Eat less meat especially seafood. Keep to vegetarian diet if possible.

    I nodded and asked: May I know what's wrong with me?

    He answered: Teri Salary Bahut Kam Hai Re...
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