Doctors Jokes

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Favourite Patients!!!

4 surgeons sat around discussing their favourite patients type.

1st surgeon says, "I like operating on librarians. When you open them up, everything is in alphabetical order."

2nd surgeon says, "I like operating on accountants. When you open them up, everything is in numerical order."

3rd surgeon says, "I like operating on electricians. When you open them up, everything is color coded."

The 4th surgeon says, "I like operating on politicians."

The other three surgeons look at each other in disbelief.

The 4th surgeon continues, "Because they're heartless, gutless, spineless, and the butts and brains are interchangeable."

Patient's Dilemma!

A woman called up the hospital and said,

"I want to know if the patient Rita Brown in Room No 1438 is getting better,"

The RMO replied, "She is doing very well. She had her first solid meal today, her blood pressure is fine and if she continues improving she might even be sent home in a couple of days."

The woman said, "Thank God! That's wonderful news!"

RMO: I take it you must be a family member or a close friend!

Woman: No I am Rita Brown. No one tells me anything!

Paranormal Phenomena!!!

A peculiarly scary thing was happening in a hospital's ICU. Every Sunday, with unfailing regularity, patients on bed number 5 died at 11 AM.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. To investigate the cause of such bizarre incidents, the doctors and nurses decide to keep strict vigilance.

A few minutes before 11 AM, the part time Sunday sweeper arrived. Whistling cheerfully, he unplugged the life support system of bed nnumber 5 and put the plug of his vacuum cleaner in it place!

Right Diagnosis

Alarmed by the prolonged discussions of his case by a group of doctors by his bedside, a patient said, "There must be something terribly wrong with me."

"Why do you say that?" asked the doctor.

"All the other doctors seem to disagree with your diagnosis."

"Don't you worry." consoled the doctor. "In a similar case sometime back I stood firm on my diagnosis and the postmortem proved me right!"

Quotes

A kiss is the shortest distance between two souls.

Trivia

Human eyes remain the same size from birth onward but noses and ears never stop growing.

Graffiti

Gravity isn't easy, but it's the law.