|1: Notice at Church|
Do not leave your mobile, purses, wallets, hand-bags, girlfriends unattended; others may think it is an answer to their prayers.
2: Who is a Psychiatrist?
Is a qualified person who gives you an expensive and critical analysis about yourself, to which your spouse also gives it to you for free & daily too!
3: Scotch is a brilliant Invention.
One double and you start feeling single again.
4: Global recession and financial crisis have become so critical and serious now-a-days that...
The majority of men have started loving their own wives!
|Do you know the relation between two eyes...???|
They never see each other... BUT
1. They blink together.
2. They move together.
3. They cry together.
4. They see together.
5. They sleep together.
They share a very deep bonded relationship...
However, when they see a pretty woman, one will blink and another will not...
Moral of the story: A pretty woman can break any relationship...
|I like duck. Duck lives in water. I also drink water. My neighbour uncle drink alcohol. Alcohol is very bad. It was told by Gandhiji. He was a good person. He had one stick. Stick swim in water. Duck also swim in water.|
Duck take bath in water. Me too take bath in water. I take bath only in 5 mins but duck take bath full day. That is why duck is so white...
I like duck so much because I love drinking milk... Milk is white in colour and blue is my favourite colour... Holi is festival of colours...
Moral of the story: WhatsApp is free. Send Anything !! People still read it...!
Coming soon... An essay on Fish.
|1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE - "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."|
2. My mother taught me RELIGION - "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL - "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week."
4. My mother taught me LOGIC - "Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC - "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT - "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY - "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS - "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM - "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA - "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER - "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY - "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE - "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION - "Stop acting like your father."
15. My mother taught me about ENVY - "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION - "Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING - "You are going to get it when you get home."
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE - "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP - "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR - "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT - "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS - "You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me ROOTS - "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM - "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. My mother taught me JUSTICE - "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you."
How many of these did your mother teach? AND how many did you teach your children?