• The Sahara Forest!!!

    A large, well established, Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good lumberjack. The very next day, a skinny little man showed up at the camp with his axe, and knocked on the head lumberjacks' door. The head lumberjack took one look at the little man and told him to leave.

    "Just give me a chance to show you what I can do," said the skinny man.

    "Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" said the lumberjack. "Take your axe and go cut it down."

    The skinny man headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the lumberjack's door. "I cut the tree down," said the man.

    The lumberjack couldn't believe his eyes and said, "Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?"

    "In the Sahara Forest," replied the puny man.

    "You mean the Sahara Desert," said the lumberjack.

    The little man laughed and answered back, "Oh sure, that's what they call it now!"
  • The Laziest Fisherman

    A visitor was strolling along the California surf one morning. During his walk he came upon a local, fishing pole clutched in his hands, sound asleep against the side of a huge coastal rock. Just then the pole began to jerk violently.

    "Hey, there!" cried the visitor as he roused the fisherman. "Look out there! You have a bite."

    "So I do," yawned the drowsy one glancing out at the water. "If you don't mind, will you pull in the line for me?"

    The visitor, somewhat surprised, did as he was requested. "Now, mister," continued the local, "put some fresh bait on the hook and cast the line out for me."

    Again the visitor complied.

    After doing so he turned to the lazy angler. "You know," he declared, "anyone as lazy as you ought to get married and have a son to do these things for him."

    "That's a good idea," beamed the fisherman. "Know where I could find a pregnant woman who's looking?"
  • The Pessimmist

    Friends, one an Optimist and the other a Pessimist could never quite agree on any topic of discussion. One day the Optimist decided he had found a good way to pull his Pessimistic friend out of his way of continual Pessimistic way of thinking.

    The Optimist owned a huntin' dog that could walk on water. His plan? Take the Pessimist and the dog out duck hunting in a boat.

    They got out into the middle of the lake, and the Optimist shot down a duck. The dog immediately walked out across the water, retrieved the duck, and walked back to the boat.

    The Optimist looked at his Pessimistic friend and said, "What do you think about that?"

    The Pessimist replied, "That dog can't swim, can he?"
  • Medical Discussion

    Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man Walking with his legs spread apart.​

    He was stiff-legged and walking slowly.​

    One student said to his friend,​ "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome.Those people walk just like that."

    The other student says, "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class."​

    Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him And one of the students said to him,​ "We're medical students and couldn't help But notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?"​

    The old man said,​ "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think."​

    The first student said, "I think it's Peltry Syndrome."​

    The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong."​

    The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome."​

    The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong."​

    So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?"​

    The old man said,​ "I thought it was G A S - but I was wrong, too!"​