|An elderly lady phoned her telephone company to report that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called... and that on the few occasions when it did ring, her pet dog always moaned right before the phone rang.|
The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile elderly lady. He climbed a nearby telephone pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed the subscriber's house. The phone didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned loudly and the telephone began to ring. Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found.....
1. The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel chain and collar.
2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.
3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the phone number was called.
4. After a couple of such jolts, the dog would start moaning and then urinate on himself and the ground.
5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring.
Which demonstrates that some problems CAN be fixed by pissing and moaning.
|Women are fickle minded.|
At 18, they want handsome men.
At 25, they want successful men.
At 30, they want sensible men.
At 40, they want mature men.
Men are very simple.
At 18, they want pretty young girls.
At 25, they want pretty young girls.
At 30, they want pretty young girls.
At 40, they want pretty young girls.
At 50, they still want pretty young girls.
See... Men are so simple minded.
|Have you witnessed few things suddenly getting changed in your life only in a span of 1 or 2 decades|
Curds became Yogurt!
Biscuits became cookies!
Sweet became Dessert!
Washerman became Housekeeper!
Rupees became bucks!
Housewife became homemaker!
Waiting area became Lobby!
Lift became elevator!
Toilet became rest room!
Husband became Hubby!
Wife became Honey!
Doctor became Doc!
Teacher became Faculty!
Dosa became pancake!
Coffee became cappuccino!
Cake became Pastry!
Scent became Perfume!
Taxi became cab!
Building became mall!
Theatre became multiplex!!!
Song became number!
Dancer became item girl!!!
Man became dude!
Photo became pic!
Biodata became Resume!
Oh God became Omg!
|One fine day, a billionaire was walking his dog.|
Suddenly a man ran out from the bushes in front of him and shot the poor dog three times.
The billionaire screamed at the killer, "Why did you do that?"
The killer answered, "Your wife gave me $50,000 and said to 'Go kill that son-of-a-bitch'".
The billionaire hugged the killer and said......."I don't know who your English teacher was, but I am forever grateful to her."