• Being Husband!

    When I reached office, I got a call from my wife.

    "What is the date today?" She said.

    I was wondering... then told her 14th September... call disconnected.
    I was wondering... her birthday? No...
    Mine?? No...
    Anniversary?? No...
    Son's birthday!!! No...
    In-laws Birthday... Anniversary? No...
    Gas booking... done...
    Utility payments... done...
    Her uncle who arrives when we want to go out, sqat and kill us and our time... his birthday... No...
    Then?!? Why date???
    Lunch and evening tea went with spinning questions... reached home...

    Junior was playing in car park... I Asked him, "How is the weather in kitchen? Tornado... Tsunami???

    Boy said, "All normal. Why?"

    "Your mom asked me... what is the date today in the morning?"

    Boy smiled and told, "I tore some sheets from calendar in morning... so she was confused..."

    Being husband is a tough job....
  • Cooking Tips for Ladies

    1. While seasoning, if you put few drops of whisky, the oil doesn't burn.

    2. While kneading dough, put a few drops of beer and the chapatis will be golden brown.

    3. If you add a few drops of vodka in paneer, it will not spoil in summer time.

    4. Putting red wine in dal will enhance the taste.

    If you can't manage the above, Try this... for guranteed success

    Pour 4 pegs in your husband's mouth, then it doesn't matter how you cook....
  • Horsing Around

    A man is sitting reading his newspaper when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the head with a frying pan.

    "What was that for?" he asks.

    "That was for the piece of paper in your trouser pocket with the name 'Mary Ellen' written on it," she replies.

    "Don't be silly," he says, "Two weeks ago when I went to the races. Mary Ellen was the name of one of the horses I bet on."

    His wife seemed satisfied at this and apologized.

    Three days later he's again sitting in his chair reading when she nails him with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him out cold.

    When he comes around he asks, "What was that for?"

    "Your frickin' HORSE phoned!"
  • Relationship Workshop

    A workshop was done on women's relationship. They were told to send a message written "I Love You" to their husbands.

    Top 10 replies from husbands are:

    1. Are you alright? Feeling sick or something? Should I bring some medicine?

    2. What happened? Did you again hit my car?
    3. I am sorry, I didn't get it.

    4. What did you do this time? I'm not going to leave you.
    5. ?????
    6. Do not make things up! Just tell me now how much do you want for your shopping?
    7. You are telling me for whom this message was or I am going to kill you.
    8. O god!!! Again your mom-dad are here?

    9. I told you don't drink too much.

    And the ultimate one:
    10. May I know who is this?