• Household Expenses

    Santa: Oye Jeeto! Bada Kharcha Ho Gaya Is Mahine... Saari Salary Khatam Ho Gayi. Kahan Lag Gaye Itne Paise.. Kahan Kharch Kar Diye???

    Jeeto: Maine Apne Liye Nahin Use Kiye... Ghar Kharch Mein Hi Lag Gaye Saare Paise.

    Santa: Kamaal Hai... Kuch Ni Bacha... Koi Hisaab-Kitaab Hai?

    Jeeto: Maine Sab Likh Ke Rakha Hai Diary Mein. Tum chahe Toh Chack Kar Lo.

    Santa: Ok, show me.

    Wife:
    1500 - Milk
    900 - PNKG
    4000 - Vegetables
    1100 - PNKG
    1800 - Dhobi
    500 - PNKG
    3500 - Maid
    800 - PNKG
    6000 - Grocery
    1500 - PNKG
    1800 - Electric & Water Bills
    1000 - PNKG
    1200 -
    600 -
    900 -
    ...
    ...
    Santa: Ek Minute... Ek Minute... Ye PNKG Kya Cheez Hai???

    Jeeto: Pata Nahi Kitthe Gaye!
  • The Happiest Day

    Harry was finally a groom and was very excited about his upcoming marriage.

    He was on his way out of the office when his boss came over to him with an outstretched hand, "Congratulations Harry! I just wanted to tell you I've been married for twenty two years, and I am sure that you will always remember this day with the fondest of memories, as the happiest day of your life."

    "But sir", said Harry, a little bit confused, "I'm not getting married until tomorrow!"

    "Yeah, I know," said his boss.
  • Once a Mom, Always a Mom

    A 50 year old lady, who suddenly started learning how to swim instead of her usual routine work of going to a temple !!!!

    Everyone was curious and asked her, "Why the change in your interest to swimming now a days?"

    The lady, with a look of helplessness replied, "Whenever my son and daughter-in-law quarrel each other she (Daughter-in-law) always asks my son, 'If your mom and I fall in water, whom will you save first?'.

    "And because I do not want to put my son in a difficult position, so I am learning how to swim!"

    A few days later husband and wife were quarrelling again, and the daughter-in-law unreasonably asked, "Now tell me! If your mom and I fall in water, whom will you save first?"

    Husband replied, "I don't have to get down in the water, my mom knows how to swim, she will save you."

    Wife refused to relent, "No, you have to jump in the water, and have to save one of us."

    Husband replied, "Then you will surely die.... because I don't know how to swim.... and my mom will definitely save me first."
  • Behind every successful...

    During a company's annual family trip to a crocodile farm in Thailand... the eccentric Boss dared any of his employees to jump into the crocodiles infested pond and swim to the shore.

    Anyone who survived the swim will be rewarded with 25 million but if killed by the crocs 2 million will be given to the next of kin.

    For a long period of time no one dared take up the challenge then suddenly a man jumped in...and swam frantically for his life towards shore pursued by the crocs and luckily he made it unscathed.
    When he managed to recover his breath... the man, who became instant millionaire, shouted asking who pushed him into the pond..... it was his wife who did it.!!!

    And from that day...that was how the phrase... "Behind every successful man...there's a woman"...came about !!!