• Retired Couple

    A retired couple is lying in bed one night and are discussing all aspects of their future.

    "What will you do if I die before you do?" husband asked wife.

    After some thought, she said, "I'd probably look for a house sharing situation with three other single or widowed women who might be a little younger than herself, since she is so active for her age."

    Then wife asked husband, "What will you do if I die first?"

    He replied, "Probably the same thing."
  • Good Wife

    A man was wandering around in a field, thinking about how good his wife had been to him, and how fortunate he was to have her.

    He asked God, "Why did you make her so kind hearted?"

    The Lord responded, "So you could love her, my son."

    "Why did you make her so good looking?"

    "So you could love her, my son." "Why did you make her such a good cook?"

    "So you could love her, my son." The man thought about this. Then he said, "I don't mean to seem ungrateful or anything, but why did you make her so stupid?"

    "So she could love you, my son."
  • The Inheritence

    Rahul's grandfather left him Rs 10 million, and the next week Maria agreed to marry him.

    After three months of married life, Rahul noticed that his beautiful new wife was ignoring him more and more. On the rare occasion that she would go to bed with him she would be indifferent, or even worse, called out other men's names!

    Whenever they went out in public, she ignored him and flirted with other men. Finally, he decided to confront her.

    "Maria," he said, "the only reason you married me was because my grandfather left me Rs 10 million when he died."

    "Don't be ridiculous," she replied, "I don't care who gave you the money!"
  • Emergency

    Although this married couple enjoyed their luxury fishing boat together, it was the husband who was behind the wheel operating the boat. He was concerned about what might happen in an emergency.

    So one day out on the lake he said to his wife, "Please take the wheel, dear. Pretend that I am having a heart attack. You must get the boat safely to shore."

    So she drove the boat to shore. Later that evening, the wife walked into the living room where her husband was watching television.

    She sat down next to him, switched the TV channel, and said to him, "Please go into the kitchen, dear. Pretend I'm having a heart attack. You must set the table, cook the dinner, and wash the dishes."