• Violating God's Law

    A missionary heard about a native who had five wives.

    He paid a visit to the native's hut, and sure enough there were five wives.

    The two men sat outside the hut and talked.

    The missionary said, "You are violating a law of God. Man can only have one wife, so you must go and tell four of those women that they can no longer live here or consider you their husband."

    The native thought a few moments, then said, "Me wait here. You tell 'em."
  • Toilet - A Marital Problem

    Toilet - A Marital Problem Dear Shirish,
    I recently had an arranged marriage and brought my wife home.
    But ever since she's come home, she's been complaining of the Indian toilet in our house. She says she's used to a Western toilet since childhood, and cannot adapt to this. Since she's acting too high-flying because of her education, I tried to explain to her that even science says that Indian toilets are better than Western. But she just refuses to understand, and has now stopped eating completely, so she does not have to go to our Indian toilet. I don't care whether she eats or not, but I cannot tolerate her disrespecting our Indian culture. Should I divorce her?

    -Indian Husband

    Dear Indian Husband,
    Sorry, I cannot answer your question in the current form. You've sent your question via email, which is not Indian culture. Send it via a pigeon, and I'll answer.
  • Smart Girlfriend

    I have a girlfriend who is a police officer. When she misses me, she just comes to my house in uniform and arrests me in presence of my wife and takes me to her home till the next day.

    Then she bring me back and tells my wife, "We are not done with investigations yet. I shall pick him up anytime we want more from him."

    And my innocent wife will always say, "Madam officer, God bless you for handling my husband's case with care I will make sure he is always available anytime you need him."
  • Will Power

    Marty arrives home from work and as soon as he sets foot in the house, Sadie is on to him, telling him that their friend Marvin has finally quit smoking.

    "Imagine that, Marty," she says, "someone who smoked 3 packs a day for 20 years has stopped smoking all of a sudden. Now that's what I call will power - something that you definitely don't have."

    But Sadie hadn't finished.

    "And that's not all. I hear that Bernie, that drunken friend of yours, is finally giving up drinking - another example of the kind of will power that you don't have."

    "OK, Sadie," said Marty, "you want to see will power, do you? Well here's will power. I am going to sleep in the spare room from now on. I am going to prove to you that I won't be affected at all by not sleeping with a woman."

    Marty keeps to his word.

    One night, when he had been sleeping alone for a week, there is a knock on his bedroom door.

    Marty shouts out, "What do you want?"

    Sadie replies, "Marvin has started smoking again."