• The Happiest Day

    Harry was finally a groom and was very excited about his upcoming marriage.

    He was on his way out of the office when his boss came over to him with an outstretched hand, "Congratulations Harry! I just wanted to tell you I've been married for twenty two years, and I am sure that you will always remember this day with the fondest of memories, as the happiest day of your life."

    "But sir", said Harry, a little bit confused, "I'm not getting married until tomorrow!"

    "Yeah, I know," said his boss.
  • Who's The Boss?

    A retiring farmer needed to rid his farm of animals in preparation for selling his land, so he went to every house in his town.

    To the houses where the husband was the boss, he gave a horse. To the houses where the wife was the boss, he gave a chicken.

    When the farmer arrived at the end of the street, he met a couple who were outside gardening.

    "Who's the boss around here?" he asked.

    "I am," replied the man.

    "Well, then, I have a black horse and a brown horse," the farmer said. "Which one would you like?"

    The man thought for a minute and said, "The black one..."

    "No, no, no... the brown one," interrupted the man's wife.

    The farmer shook his head and remarked to the man, "Here's your chicken.
  • The Innocent Wife !

    Wife calls her scientist husband... "Honey... It's Friday... you're late..."

    "I'm busy with my team in an experiment."

    "Whats that?"

    "We've just added a derivative of C2H5OH with ambient temperature H2O and aqueous CO2. To cool this mixture added some super low temperature, solidified H2O, now while waiting for some protein, we are fumigating the lab with vapours of nicotine...
    It's 4 or 5 round experiment... So I will be late."

    "Oh dear... I won't disturb you... please take your time..."

    C2H5OH (Whiskey)
    H2O (Water)
    Aqueous CO2 (Soda)
    Protein (Chicken)
    Vapours of Nicotine (Smoking)
  • Best Children's Day

    Yesterday morning, a woman said to her husband, "I'll bet you don't know what day this is."

    "Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for the office.

    At 10:00 AM, the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses.

    At 1:00 PM, a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress.

    The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.

    "First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed. "I've never had a more wonderful Children's Day in my life!"